T-Wave yearbook 1996

              ^^.r^-:--
i,; ±-^y.j
Digitized by the Internet Archive
in 2010 with funding from
Lyrasis IVIembers and Sloan Foundation
http://www.archive.org/details/twaveyearbook1996edit
r-WAVE 19
/olume Fifteen
Tulane University School of Medicine
New Orleans, Louisiana
;^^-|ittillltr^3iil3fiNATeHE|,
y^2;|/:ii^>;^,^ . ' n /• B . il!!«5llll«l nil!!! M£
Sights in the Big Easy
Tulane Medical School
The Tulane University Scliool of
Medicine began as the Medical College
of Louisiana in September 1834, as three
brash young physicians initiated medical
education in Louisiana. Establishment of
the school was met with considerable op-position
from the Creoles, whose Euro-pean
ideas concerning medical education
stressed academics well grounded in the
Latin and Greek classics. Nonetheless,
when the Medical College opened its
doors in January 1835, it became the first
medical school in the Deep South, and the
fifteenth in the country.
There were only eleven students
in the first class. Tuition, fees, room, and
board came to less than four hundred
dollars a year. The first few years were
difficult ones as deans seemed to come
and go, and faculty members changed
frequently. By 1843, however, there were
over one hundred students. Even then,
the student body came from as far away
as Pennsylvania and Connecticut, which
would have been weeks away. They also
came from closer states, such as Missis-sippi
and Alabama.
Medical school in those days was
quite different than it is today. Only
eight months of lectures was required to
obtain an MD. The school year was four
months long. The same seven courses
were repeated over again in the second
year. The curriculum consisted of classes
in Anatomy and Physiology, Chemistry,
Materiae Medica, Principles and Practice
of Medicine, Surgery, Obstetrics, and the
diseases of women and children. Profes-sors
received no salary, but were com-pensated
instead by selling tickets to their
lectures to the medical students. Instruc-tion
was almost wholly didactic, with
practical instruction in Anatomy only.
The lectures were delivered to the entire
student body assembled in a large room
or amphitheatre. Clinical subjects were
taught in the same manner. Indeed, the
unmotivated students would often gradu-ate
without having ever attended a deliv-ery,
observed an operation or even exam-ined
a patient, as these were to be learned
as an apprentice to a physician.
» #«
W
i<--j?-^
|-«~-lTi
JllllUI
E
The Civil War brought a halt to
all formal medical training in 1862. The
Medical College of Louisiana was fortu-nate
to find financial security in the form
of Paul Tulane, a wealthy New Orleans
merchant, who bequeathed $1,250,000 to
provide for a new university. In 1 884, the
various departments of the University of
Louisiana were placed under the aegis of
the new institution. The Tulane Univer-sity
of Louisiana.
In 1910, Abraham Flexner pub-lished
his report of the ranking and clas-sification
of medical schools, with Tulane
ranked as one of the top three Southern
institutions. At that time, Tulane's promi-nent
faculty included the great Dr.
Rudolph Matas, a vascular surgeon, and
Isadore Dyer, a noted dermatologist who
was instrumental in the development of
the leprosarium in Carrville, Louisiana.
In 1 9 1 3, Tulane boasted a School
of Pharmacy, School of Dentistry, School
of Medicine, and Graduate School of
Medicine (only the latter two still re-main).
The Tulane Medical Center was
organized in 1969 to broaden Tulane's
commitment to medical education, re-search,
and patient care. The Tulane
Medical Center Hospital and Clinic, the
first such university hospital in Louisi-ana,
was dedicated in October 1976. This
300-bed hospital has enabled Tulane to
consolidate a wide range of services in a
tertiary care environment and it has be-come
a major referral center in the re-gion.
Since its founding 162 years ago
as the Medical College of Louisiana, the
Tulane University School of Medicine
has undergone many changes. The most
recent of these have been the addition of
a new hospital wing and the Environmen-tal
Health Research building. Though
Tulane originally catered to students
mainly from the South, it now attracts
students from all parts of the United
States. From its meager beginnings in
1834, the Tulane University School of
Medicine has given over 12,000 medical
degrees. Paul Tulane would certainly be
proud of the many physicians who have
graduated IVom the university bearing his
name.
H
A
L
LOW
E
E
N
Charity Hospital
A New Orleans Legend
Steeped in Louisiana history. Char-ity
hospital embraces an intriguing and col-orful
past, having survived economic hard-ships,
natural disasters, and some of the
worst political and patronage problems in
the country.
Its charter dates back to January
1736, when Jean Louis, a French sailor,
bequeathed his estate to the founding and
furnishing of Charity Hospital in early
French Colonial Louisiana. This makes it
the oldest continually operating hospital in
what is now United States territory (Bellevue
Hospital in New York City was established
two months later).
Within ten years, it became neces-sary
to build a new building to replace the
overcrowded original structure. The new
hospital was conveniently located between
a canal—for receiving patients and supplies,
and a cemetery—for burying the deceased.
In 1779, a great hurricane wreaked
havoc on New Orleans, reducing Charity to
ruins. Rebuilt, Charity fell prey to a kitchen
fire in 1 809, which burned the entire hospi-tal
to the ground. The indigent sick were
temporarily housed in the Cabildo until the
hospital could be restored. Five years after
the fire, a new hospital was completed with
the facilities "vast and commodious, ca-pable
of caring for 120 patients."
A group of citizens visiting Char-ity
in 1818 were horrified by the conditions
of the patients, the hospital filthiness, and
the total inadequacy of the attendants. They
complained to the governor and Hospital
administration and it became clear that new
facilities were again needed. In 1833, the
fourth version of Charity was completed at
the cost of $ 1 49,570. With the arrival of the
Daughters of Charity and the Medical Col-lege
of Louisiana, the overall medical atmo-sphere
in New Orleans was excellent. At
that time, the entire medical complex was
very likely the best of its kind in the world.
Charity weathered the Civil War,
and prospered during the remainder of the
nineteenth century. By 1900, the hospital
probably contained almost 2,000 beds, while
other hospitals in the city had perhaps only
150 beds combined.
As World War I came to a close, a
new war was just beginning between the
School of Medicine and Hospital Adminis-trators.
The worst was yet to come under
f s- i ti-iy /
Huey P. Long's administration. Long imme-diately
reorganized the Board of Adminis-trators
and replaced the Superintendent with
Dr. Arthur Vidrine. In 1930, Long abruptly
dismissed Dr. Alton Ochsner allegedly be-cause
of Dr. Ochsners's complaints about
political constraints placed on his attempts
to build a first-rate surgery department at
Tulane. This feud, along with the failure of
Tulane to award Long the law degree that he
desired, quite possibly played a role in the
establishment of the Louisiana State Univer-sity
School of Medicine.
It had been clear for many years that
the 100-year-old Charity building again
needed to be replaced. Following Long's
assasination in 1933. federal funds became
available to build the current structure, com-pleted
on June 27, 1939.
After World War II, problems in-volving
interrelationships developed not only
for Charity, but also for the medical schools.
The Ochsner Clinic emerged as a large medi-cal
institution, employing many of Tulane's
faculty and developing its own residency
training programs. The Veterans
Adminstration Hospital also developed a resi-dency
program. With the rise of LSU Medi-cal
School, the old controversies between
Tulane and Charity were now simply ex-tended
to it as well.
In the late 1950s, many sweeping
changes were considered for Charity and its
associated schools. In the 1960s, the ugly
matter of segregation was dealt with and the
"colored" and "white" wards that were on
separate sides of the hospital were elimi-nated.
By the late 1960s, financial prob-lems
for the hospital and both schools were
paramount, particularly as Tulane was in-creasing
its residency affiliations with hos-pitals
other than Charity. Woefully inad-equate
financing continued, however, and
the hospital has lost its accreditation on sev-eral
occasions since 1975. This threatens not
only Charity, but both medical schools and
the entire medical education process.
While plans for problem solving
are being developed, the question remains:
"Is Charily an anachronism, or can il be
properly i'Luuled and equipped to provide
excellent care and leaching opporliMiilies
as il has in the past?" One can only hope
IJKil liilure adniinislralors will acl favor-ably
on inilialives to preserve Charity's
iradilion and improve on its current state
of affairs.
MARDI
GRAS
iiT§35
iiy'tA^:}^'
Tulane University Medical Center
School of Medicine
Office of Admissions
1 430 Tulane Avenue
New Orleans. Louisiana 70112
(504) 588-5187 November 26, 1991
Dear
I take great pleasure in informing you of your appointment to the first-year
medical class at the Tulane University School of Medicine, to enter in August
of 1992. I sincerely hope that you will accept our invitation to take your
medical training at .Tulane, and look forward to having you' join us.
I am sure you will understand that your appointment is contingent upon
successful completion of all required premedical courses, completion of the
academic program in which you are currently enrolled and maintenance of the
level of academic performance that was part of the basis for your acceptance.
A final transcript of your grades must be forwarded to this office as soon as
your school closes.
On the assumption that you might need financial assistance during your first
year in medical school, I have asked the Financial Aid Coordinator to forward,
under separate cover, application materials and other information. If you
need additional information about financial aid, please correspond directly
with; Financial Aid Coordinator, Office of the Dean, Tulane University School
of Medicine, 1430 Tulane Avenue, New Orleans, LA 70112.
On behalf of the students, faculty, and administration at Tulane, I bid you a
most enthusiastic welcome. If I can be of service to you in any way, please
feel free to call upon me.
Sincerely,
CI ifford Newman, Ph.D.
Associate Dean and Chairman
Committee on Admissions
WCNdt
17
Carrick J. Adam
Santa Maria, CA
California Polytechnic State Univ.,
San Luis Obispo
BS, 1991; MSPH, 1992
Leslie Brannon Aden
Jackson, MS
Washington & Lee University
BS, 1992
Vjs
Mateen K. Aliniazee
Corvallis, OR
Tulane University
BS, 1993
Sean T. Allan
Palm Springs, CA
U. of California, LA
BS, Kinesiology, 1991
Thank you to each person
who has supported my life
these last four years.
Special thanks to Peggy,
Michelle, Veronica, and
Lorrie for allowing me to
be me. Lastly, thanks
Mom and Dad for your
unconditional love and
support.
-y
1 4i
John Alex Allen
Atlanta, GA
University of Georgia
BS, 1992
rn
m
Q
T!
m
«x n
Arthur E. Apolinario
Rydal, PA
Gannon University
BA, 1992
MPH, 1996
William Paul Archer, Jr.
Metairie, LA
Tulane University
BS, 1991
iil
-"«^w , ' -^ms,^
, ^ ^ -l^
P^H
Wmm i^3
r "-/ i^^^H^P^ ^
7V- ^ fl^H^^^^^^^ V. ^r'
'-~^.;^ - S ^
. > "'S^
Layne Thomas Barker
Syracuse, VT
Brigham Young University
BS, 1992
r -^
Rhonda Stultz Bass
' Bothell,WA
Western Washington University
BS, 1991
Jeffrey V. M. Behar
Durham, NC
University of Colorado, Boulder j
BA, 1987
MS, 1992
Thomas Winfield Bender III
Mobile, AL
United States Air Force Academy
BS, 1992
ik^
Scott Benjamin
Coral Springs, FL
Tulane University
BA, 1991
G. Todd Bessinger
Buffalo, WY
NorthwestemUniversity
BA, 1991
MPHTM1996,PhD 1998
Jim Burnett
Acampo, CA
University of
California, Davis
BS, 1992
Kyle Denbow
Santa Cruz, CA
University of Cali-fornia,
Santa Barbara
BA, 1990
Rex Hoffman
Palos Verdes, CA
University of Cali-fornia,
San Diego
BA, 1991
Carl E Palumbo
Sacramento, CA
University of Cali-fornia,
Los Angeles
BS, 1992
Troy Richards
Panama City, FL
Tulane University
BS, 1 992
Virabandith 'Victoi^'
Songbandith
St. Petersburg, FL
Tulane University
BS, 1991
ti\
You Know You're At Home In New Orleans When.,
You drink Dixie, not sing it
You not only say Tchoupitoulas, but you can say it without laughing
You have discovered that those three inch long cockroaches can fly, but you
have decided to maintain your sanity anyway
You begin to believe that purple, green, and gold look good together and will
even eat things those colors
You know exactly what you are going to eat next Monday, and the Monday
after that, and the Monday after that...
You are no longer shocked when someone advises you to suck the heads and
pinch the tails
You make groceries, not buy them
You're not afraid when someone wants to axe you something
You consider it an honor, on certain occasions, to have cabbages or coconuts
thrown at you
You are able to make a U-turn on St. Charles Avenue avoiding joggers, other
drivers, and moving streetcars
You describe items of a certain hue as being K&B purple
You get on a bus marked CEMETERIES without a second thought
You think a ten foot ceiling is rather low
You don't think twice about walking outside with a beer in your hand
You look both ways before going through a green Ught
You've finally mastered the technique of hitting a cockroach with a shoe just
hard enough to kill the cockroach but not ruin your oriental carpet
You'll only eat a sandwich that's bigger than your head
You can navigate without ever making a left turn
You reinforce your attic floor so you can store more beads and cups
IsL
Michael Bober
Baltimore, MD
Tulane University
BES, 1988; MS, 1992
PhD, 1996
When I see shooting stars travel across the sky
I make believe that you and I
Are one with the heavens
So cast to the wind, unleash the powers within
Open doors, walk through the room of change
Only your dreams have no boundaries
Don't stay in between
You can go anywhere
--the Vangoes
Mark Christopher
Bocchicchio
Encino, CA
University of California,
"^ San Diego
BS, 1991
Bradley A. Boone
Meridian, MS
The University of the South
BS, 1992
Mary Zita Jackson Boone
Thibodaux, LA
Newcomb College of
Tulane University
BS, 1991
.11
Charles W. Bouch
Long Beach, CA
University of California,
Berkeley
BS, 1991
Neil G. Brown
Wheaton, IL
University of Illinois
BA, 1992
Wesley Bryan
Graceville, FL
Tulane University
BS, 1992
l^^^^
/•
—*
, <t:-^ IM
Anita Praba
Cherry Hill, NJ
Texas A&M
BS, 1992
Alicia Diaz
Havana, Cuba
Tulane University
BA, 1992
Huy Q. Tran
New Orleans, LA
Tulane University
BS, 1990
MA/BA, 1992
A little learning is a dangerous thing;
Drink deep, or taste not the Pierian spring;
There shallow draughts intoxicate the brain,
And drinking largely sobers us again.
-Alexander Popt
If you have built your castles in the air.
Your work need not be lost;
That is where thev should be.
Now put the foundations under them.
-Henry David Thoreau
'Beeper Obliterans': Clinical Staging
and Natural History
To the Edtior — In \\\\> rcpori. we de-scribe
a common but prc\K>u>i\ unchar-actenzed
clinical en.tu\ aJicciing hosp-ital
staiJ' physicians beeper ohluerans
'
The essential element ol'ihis s\iidrome is
the penodic emission of high-pitched
electronic tones secondan to an ever-increasing
abdominal girth thai impmges
on the test button located on the supe-rior
aspect of the wearers pager-beeper
Using a modified version of the Dis-ease
Staging' methodology, we(two staff
pediatricians with 25 years of combined
expenence) have described this cond-ition's
inexorable march (see Table)
Advancement to stage 4 is directly
correlated to a body mass index of 35
kg/nr or greater, clinical service of 10 or
more \eais, and knowledge of the code
U'l the patient pantry-door lock. Of
inieresi is the notable "silent phase" seen
at the le<.el of departmental chairman
(uhen beeper is shed and all calls are
tiiken hv the secretary, program director,
or safeK ignored). Further research on
the natural histors' and treatment of this
ponderous problem is suggested.
Neil Izenberg, MD
Steven A. Dowshen, MD
Albert Einstein Medical Center
Philadelphia, Pa
1 GttnneUa JF, ed Disease Staging. 3rd ed. New
'I'ork. NY SysteMetrics McGraw Hill; 1986
Statue and C>escnptJof>
Condition-free Bespe' functions as aesign«; "nysiaan alen and ready Reaches phone
wTthir 15 s 100% o* time Booy nTast inoei (BMI) = 22 BMi = wtAtf'tkg/nt^
Pager Pauncfi Trunca' flexion Dy wears- sets of oeepe' ie«i button Pnysidan trequentfy
confused Answers < SS^-i, of pages Bftfl' = 25 Kg/nr^ ____^
Seepe' Bulge Aboomtna' overtiang inteir.mennv mutfies audio tones {"soutfl6 affecf";
Woreenac Dy consumption of higti-ticief meais Suflete- strains al iisloning, ameliorated
Dy loss of nign-tone haanng BMi = gg Kg^rp
Page! Jn^reus Tone sei o^ even Dv qui©' rasorabons Plof! of pants at tfie belt line
causes pagef mverwon witr, cnaractansiic "ecnc eftec: ' Wearei disonemod dy mictp-wave
Deaps ir, hospita- snaci- Da' -'ass o' oajes answerea (paradomcal irttatiility;
BMi = 31 Kg/nr
eeeoef Oc/TO/WK Beepe; completely anveiopec D> aaipoae ussue Assoaatec with n-craesec
nan of coronary aner>' and gallDiadoe- diseases, as welt as non-msuUr-depenoem
diapaies O'-pf pages answerec BM,*3S ngm^ Surgical temovai m ele-vation
ID cnaifma/yst^t may oe mdicatec, 'see text.
Mary E. Byers
Orlando, FL
Vanderbilt University
BA, 1992
^;
Neil E. Canby
Rancho Cordova, CA
University of California, Davis
BA, BS, 1991
—4r—V^^l^^
Thomas Hilton Cawthon, Jr.
Montgomery, AL
Hampden-Sydney College
BS, 1990
f*^
James Alan Chambers *
Columbus, GA
Auburn University
BS, 1992
Eli L. Chang
Cerritos, CA
University of California, Los Angeles
BS, 1992
^r^^
( '
* 1
Aaron J. Charles
Chicago, IL
University of Arizona
BA, 1988
Mark A. Chastain
Columbus, GA
Emory University
BA, 1990
..«
Mi
ij^jl
^^IBn^ lit
n\\mBa j
•"*ma^^^
1
\ M
Peggy C. Chen
Mobile, AL
University of Alabama
at Birmingham
BS, 1992
This is dedicated to my Mom
and Dad. Thanks for your love
and support. Although you
didn't always agree with me,
you let me choose my own
path, and for that I will always
be grateful. I couldn't have
made it this far without you.
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I
I took the road less traveled by.
And that has made all the difference...
To all my friends, especially Sean, Scottie Pie, Michelle, Enoch,
Allison, Meredith, Paul, and Sid, thanks for being such freaks.
Sean, thanks for your couch, your craziness, and your MTV.
Thanks to Judy and Steve. I love you guys. 'M
Sheri D. Cheung
Las Vegas, NV
Whittier College
BA, 1992
Grace H. Chun
Santa Monica, CA
University of California,
Los Angeles
BS, 1992
Timothy S. Church
Salinas, CA
University of California,
Davis
BS, 1991
Peter M. Clark
Los Altos, CA
University of California, Davis
BS, 1992
Russell Clark
Mammoth Lakes, CA
California State Polytechnic
University, Pomona
BS, 1986
MS,1996
AMEANSEASON
Tropical Storm Jm
IhlS ibitl.
o o
S:
Roxann*
Tuacday 10 p.m.,
20.ZN S7.8W
"p
..^^
Thomas A. Clark
Spokane, WA
Tulane University
BS, 1992
Melissa Ann Cnota
Scottsdale, AZ
University of Arizona
BA, 1992
MPH, 1996
Judson W. Cook
Westport, CT
Tulane University
1990
No MORE €,AMeS!
NO t^O /^E 6AMa 5 f
pop. A ?\Jfi,^oSB .
Jl^ \;:''
fcf^f^*
1
i
i^^.-^^^-
^" Ws^' l?T^'' U
4^-
"^^ ^^ -*%"
, 1
Class of 1996
Sweethearts
Part I
Joseph Litton Cooper
Nashville, TN
Tulane University
BS, 1992
Molly Lynne Courtright
Santa Cruz, CA
University of California,
Santa Barbara
BA, 1992
Brett L. Cucchiara
Rochester, MN
Carleton College
BA, 1992
With the breakdown of the Medieval system, the gods of Chaos,
Lunacy, and Bad Taste gained ascendancy After a penod in
which the western world had enjoyed order, tranquihty, unity and
oneness with its True God and Trinity, there appeared winds of
change which spelled evil days ahead.. Fortuna's wheel had turned
on humanity, crushing its collarbone, smashing its skull, twisting its
torso, puncturing its pelvis, sorrowmg its soul. Havmg once been
so high, humanity feU so low. What had once been dedicated to the
soul was now dedicated to the sale Merchants and charlatans
gamed control of Europe, calling their liisidious gospel "The
Enhghtenment. " The day of the locust was at hand, but from the
ashes of humanity there arose no Phoenix The humble and pious
peasant, Piers Plowman, went to town to sell his children to the
lords of the New Order for purposes that we may call questionable
at best The gyre had widened; The Great Cham of Being had
snapped like so many paper clips strung together by some droobng
idiot, death, destruction, anarchy, progress, ambition, and self-improvement
were to be Pier's new fate And a vicious fate it was
to be now he was faced with the perversion of having to GO TO
WORK
Ignatius J Reilly in A Confederacy ofDunces
James Mathew Debnam
Saint Louis, MO
Millsaps College
BS, 1992
Myrtle Ann Delgado
Pascagoula, MS
Millsaps College
BS, 1991
-1^
Nestor K. Delgado
Jonesboro, GA
University of South Florida
BS, 1992
A Reading From The Book of Episiotomy
Chapter 5, Vv. 3-0 to 6-0 Chromic
As Told By Leslie Wilson
And the LORD spoke unto Neohomo, who was called Kliph, saying unto him: "Gather ye my CHOSEN, who shall nximber
sevenscore and eight, that you might instructeth them in the ways of healing. Bring them to this place that I have appointed, which
place shall henceforth be called Toolain, meaning "the appointed place." Gather them from all the land; verily, even from the furthest
hiaterlands, Kali-phonya and Nyauk, so that they might hear the words of healing.
And Kliph did as the LORD instructed, bringmg unto Toolain the best and the brightest, that they might learn the healing arts.
And when he had gathered the CHOSEN, Kliph called out unto the LORD, saying, "Oh LORD, I have done as thou hast commanded
me. Mightily I have stuggled, thy wish to fulfill. See thou, I have brought Greeks, and Abrahams, and others; verily have I striven to
bring a diverse class hereunto."
And the LORD spoke unto Kliph, saying unto him, "Thou hast mdeed fulfilled My wishes, oh Kliph; and I am mightily
pleased with thy handiwork. Thou hast done a good job, and as a reward therefore, thou shalt henceforth be called Assistant Dean of
Admissions, despite the obvious anachronism. Know thou that I shall test these, my CHOSEN, mightily, lest they fall from the ways of
grace. Many hardships and tribulations shall they endure, and often shall they be tested; yea, to start with, they shall be tested after each
Sabbath, with raie exceptions. Great shall be the knowledge they will learn, and it won't be easy, let Me tell thee. And know that they
shall be tested even after graduation, and afilicted with such plagues as insurance agents, ambulance chasers, managed care, and
capitation; yet, insolong as they follow my law, so long they shall prevail."
And the LORD began the testing of the CHOSEN. And the first plague he sent upon them was the fiend Anatomie. And yet
the people prevailed against Anatomie, stuffing their minds full of useless trivia; so much so that the one called Kirby became upset,
shouting forth his wrath to the CHOSEN. Fortunately, they ignored him. Others of the CHOSEN reacted to this volume of information
more strangely, some by embellishmg the sacred scripts known as Class Note Sets, others by publishing poor attempts at humorous
newsletters, henceforth known as the Salpingophaiyngeus. And often did these attempts fail.
And during this time there rose up among the CHOSEN a group led by Woll, the Great Consumer of Diet Coke. And they
took it upon themselves the task of organizing a great celebration for the chosen, to commemorate the victory over the fiend Anatomie.
And mightily did the CHOSEN celebrate this victory on the holiday known as Cadaver Ball. And the LORD saw these celebrations,
and He chuckled, saymg unto Kliph, "They still don't realize what they've gotten themsleves into, do they, Kliph?" and Kliph rephed,
"No, my LORD."
And yet, despite their ignorance (or perhaps because of it), the CHOSEN prospered. And it was at this time, the LORD,
Seeing a faithful servant in Kliph, took him from the CHOSEN and brought him to assist in the LORD'S admission office. The LORD,
not wanting to leave the CHOSEN without a father, gave unto them the Great P'zhano. The CHOSEN then continued to learn the arts
of the healer, as the LORD wished.
And the CHOSEN continued in their struggle, and the LORD continued his testing thereof Truly did he test them, sending
upon them the plagues Biokemm and Fizy-o. And yet even this did the CHOSEN master, despite lectures on eager reactions and action
potentials.
And the LORD continued his testing of the people, with the enemies Paath, Faarm, My-kro, and Eyseehem. And He sent
upon the CHOSEN the monsters Djonsun, who knew much of famous dead physicians, and Doam-ah, who knew much of unknown
dead words. And when the CHOSEN had bested these trials, the LORD sent unto the people the greatest plague yet, called USMLE I.
And as the LORD had foreseen, some did well, others fared poorly, yet all were allowed to continue. The LORD spoke unto them,
saying, "Verily dost thou. My CHOSEN, walk in the path of righteousness, and follow my teaching. And therefore shall I send thee My
greatest trial."
And then began the year of greatest toil and labor and deliveries, called the Junoir Year, for reasons now lost. And the
CHOSEN were afflicted with the most horrible of all the plagues wherewith the LORD tested them, with the plague He called Skutt.
And the LORD afflicted them with boils, and vesicles, and maculopapular eruptions, and lumbago, and dropsy, and consumption, and
pleurisy. And He sent against them all manners of vicious creatures: terns, and tigers of Elesu, and crabs, and trolls, and roaches, and
sloths who operated terrible machines in the place known as Chairatee to carry people up and down but would never stop for the
CHOSEN. And verily even did the LORD send chief residents to plague the People, and the Big Beeper, and the Big Sneeze, and the
Upper Motor Neurons, and even these the CHOSEN vanquished.
And at the end of that year, the LORD said unto the CHOSEN, "Now mayest thou rest, for truly hast thou struggled and
overcome the trials I have sent upon thee. And now truly art thou studs. Go forth, and celebrate this victory; make merry and frolick
this one year, because the hard part cometh next. For at the end of this year, truly shalt thou enter into the very valley of the shadow of
Death; and as you know, valleys are between hills, and we all know what rolleth down hills."
And the CHOSEN did as the LORD commanded, celebrating for one year and sloughing off their work, for truly they were
semor studs now. And although they thought about the trials and tabulations to come, they didn't think about them too much, for why
spoileth a good time?
So endeth this reading from the Chromcles of the CHOSEN of 1996.
Edward L. Dent
Aspen, CO
University of Colorado
BS, 1989
Gary P. Dupuy
New Orleans, LA
Xavier University
BS, 1992
.U
Mark H. Eikenberry
Englewood, CO
University of California,
San Diego
BS, 1992
^^^#
. ... ^w,: -d F^ j«P!
P^J,
/a
' ^
4 1
,.^ \
V. J
?^ * '
''. '*^Ji a
Timothy S. Errera
Melbourne Beach, FL
Duke University
BA, 1992
Jennifer C. Evans
Louisville, KY
Emory University
BS, 1987
MPH, 1996
John O'hara Evered
Seattle, WA
Whitman College
BA, 1987
MPH, 1996
Mark Alan Farrior
Lake Charles, LA
Tulane University
BS, 1992
The Five Best Doctors Anywheix
The five best doctors anywhere.
And no one can deny it.
Are Doctors Sunshine, Water, Air,
Exercise, and Diet.
These five wiU gladly you attend.
If only you are willing;
And charge you not one shilling.
O. S. Hoffman
Think naught a trifle, though it
small appear;
Sands make the mountain.
Moments make the year,
and trifles ~ life.
The Human Touch
Tis the human touch in this world
that counts,
The touch of your hand and mine.
Which means far more to the
fainting heart
Than shelter and bread and wine;
For shelter is gone when the night
is o'er.
And bread only lasts a day,
But the touch of the hand and the
sound of the voice
Sing on in the soul alway.
Spencer Michael Free
Melanie A. Fieselman
Jackson, MS
Dartmouth College
BA, 1992
Frank John Fischer, III
Winter Haven, FL
University of North Carolina,
Chapel Hill
BS, 1992
Philip C. Fitzpatrick
New Orleans, LA
Tulane University
BSE, 1989
ME, 1992
Mahtab B. Foroozesh
Tehran, Iran
Louisiana State University
BS, 1991
jif'air
':. With thanks to
^i my family and
^ ^ friends for their
love and
^ support, and in
; remembrance
of my mother
Si^ for being my
,^ inspiration.
Bryan Henry Frain
North Potomac, MD
University of Maryland
BA, 1988
Marc Allan Futemick
Miami, FL
University of California,
Los Angeles
BS, 1992
'•' •»«. .1^
Pamela J. Geddis
San Diego, CA
University of California, Los Angelee
BS, 1992
i- ^ ifci^
Jason C. Gilster
St. Louis Park, MN
St. Olaf College
BA, 1991
H^"
Tunicia Ann Giron
New Orleans, LA
Xavier University
BS, 1992
Deborah Glupczynski
Phoenicia, NY
Brown University
AB, 1991
MPH, 1996
The Arnolds: A special thanks.
David; "Welcome aboard Trans-sex Airlines, II there should be a sudden iaii in pressure, I will drop irom the
I •
I ceiling and apply more." (Prince)
I Friends and Family: "I have never seen my own forces so taken up and shared and given back." (A. Rich)
Mf^^^^^^,
Page B. Griffin
San Jose, CA
University of California, Davis
BS, 1992
MPH, 1996
Many thanks to my family and friends for all their prayers, support, and love.
Without all of y'all, I would not have made it!
Page Griffin
Al IHORIZEI)
PERSONNEL
OM
Eric Dewitt Griggs
Winston-Salem, NC
University of Notre Dame
BA, 1992
1 B^V
1 #.i«iy
Suzanne Barbara Hart
Baton Rouge, LA
Louisiana State University
BS, 1989 MS, 1992
MPH, 1996
r^OM^
^fc Hsfe
HHL '*^ "llf «> a m
\ ' -^
IhV^Hl
*^/ . *_jiiH
Allison B. Herman
New Rochelle, NY
State University of
New York, Albany
BA, 1992
MPH, 1996
Jacqueline Herrfeldt
Santa Rosa, CA
University of Notre Dame
BS, 1983
MS, 1992
Lisa D. Hitchins
Houston, TX
Texas A&M University
BS, 1989
Nancy Garrett Hoover
Baton Rouge, LA
Millsaps College
BS, 1992
Its All Greek To Me
The staff of Aesculapius (Latin spelling) is pictured as a wooden staff with a single serpent
twining around it. Aesculepius (Greek spelling) was the Greek god of medicine, and was the
son of Apollo and the nymph Coronis. According to legend Coronis was killed for being
unfaithful, but Aesculapius was saved and raised by Chiron, the centaur, who taught Aescula-pius
the ways of the healing arts. Aesculapius married Eipone and had several children
including two daughters. Hygiea and Panaceia, and two sons. Machaon and Podaleirios. the
two sons being noted by Homer in the Iliad as physicians during the Trojan War. The remedies
practiced by Aesculapius varied from benign advise such as fasting to reduce fever, to more
violent therapies of bleeding, abstinence, and "friction". Many temples were built for Aescu-lapius,
the more famous ones being Cos. Cnidus. and Epidaurus. and it was common for
stricken individuals to actually sleep at the temples whereby the gods would visit them at
night and their dreams would be interpreted in the morning for clues toward the cure of their
ailment. One legend describes Aesculapius' death as a result of a thunderbolt hurled by Zeus
who was jealous of the healing skills possessed by Aesculapius as they threatened to make
men immortal and therefore equals to the gods. The tradition of Aesculapius was brought to
Rome around 293 B.C. in hopes that it would bring good luck and healing against a plague
that was at that time assalting the city.
The image of Aesculapius was always with a walking staff in hand, around which twined a
single serpent. The snake has historically represented wisdom, learning and fertility. Its
association with the healing arts may well come from it's long life, keen eyesight, and annual
renewal of skin. The staff and snake symbol eventually came to stand on it's own to represent
the pure, ethical, and non-commercial ideals of medicine. It is currently the symbol for the
Royal Medical Corps of Great Britain, the American Medical Association, and the Royal
Canadian Medical Corps.
The caduceus consists of a long, straight staff, topped by a pair of wings, and
around which two serpents are entwined. It's development into a symbol for
medicine is somewhat more obscure.
A look to Greek mythology reveals that the staff is associated with Hermes, the
wing-footed messenger of the gods (Roman: Mercury), who carried the staff as a
symbol of peace. As legend goes the staff was originally given to Hermes by
Apollo as a reward for allowing Apollo to invent the lyre. The staff had the power
to unite all things divided by hale: when Hermes traveled to Arcadia he came upon
two serpents locked in combat al which time he placed the staff between them and
observed the cessation of their fighting and a friendly entwining of both snakes
around the staff. The word caduceus roughly translates to "herald's wand" in
Greek. The wand was carried by heralds and town cryers. and served as both a
symbol of public office and as an emblem of peaceful and neutral gatherings. It
was first used as a medical symbol in the 16th century by Johann Froeben, a
publisher of medical books, who used to print the caduceus on his title pages.
Then a physician to Henry VIII began to use the emblem on his crest. In 1856 the
caduceus was associated with the "Hospital Stewards of the U.S. Army". In 1871
the U.S. Public Health Service began to use the symbol, and it was finally adopted
by the US Army Medical Corps in 1910. One possible reason for the development
of the dduceus to represent medicine over the staff of Aesculapius is that it is a
more balanced and aesthetically pleasing symbol.
— David R, Quincy
Enoch T. Huang
Baton Rouge, LA
Princeton University
BA, 1992
MPH & TM, 1995
'f* ^^
%.
/®k
Gregory D. Huhn
La Mesa, CA
University of California,
Berkeley
BA, 1987
MPH & TM, 1996
^Tt- -V^
Howard Elliot Jeffries
Miami, FL
Dartmouth College
BA, 1992
^POP
W ^^^fe^''
i -ix &
Jason G. Jones
Canton, MA
Boston University
BA, 1992
A
Louis C. M. Jordan
Virginia Beach, VA
University of Virginia
BA, 1990
,4\
Cami Ullah Jordan
Fernandina Beach, FL
Tulane University
BA, 1989
m5iP^..-r^i^liJ
K~4^H^^^^^^^k ''^^^^^H1^ #»^- ^^^^H I
Eric W. Klein
Caldwell, ID
University of California,
Davis
BS, 1992
MPH & TM, 1996
Mark T. Knower
New Orleans, LA
Tulane University
BS/BA, 1992
Van Lam
San Diego, CA
Tulane University
BS, 1992
Andrew L. Landers
Camden, AR
Ouachita Baptist University
BS, 1992
Donald J. Lauer
Portola Valley, CA
University of California, San Diegc
BS, 1992
MPH&TM, 1996
Charles Po-Yang Lee
Lexington, MA
Massachusetts Institute
of Technology ^^
BS, 1992
Lisa S. Lee-Alevizon
Redding, CA
University of California, Santa Cruz
BA, 1991
Alwin Carl Lewis
Burbank, CA
University of California, San Diego
BS, 1992
MPH, 1997
V^'**'
Walter Dickinson Liebkeman
Metairie, LA
Tulane University
BS, 1992
Diane M. Lovell
Silver Spring, MD
University of Maryland,
College Park
BS, 1990
Shelly Anne Lovitt
Nyssa, OR
Tulane University
BA, 1992
Joshua E. Lowentritt
New Orleans, LA
Duke University
BA, 1989
-pteliS!*!
TO
'' ^E Jl
\
HBB
WtlW^'i^1
Megan M. Lynch
Stone Mountain, GA
University of California, Davis
BS, 1992
.,
Richard Kevin
Macdonald
Mesa, AZ
Arizona State University
BS, 1992
My lieartlell llianks to...
...Kerri, tor encouraging ana supporting me and ror lielping me reack iny goals.
...Haley and Payton, ror Ineir nugs, kisses, and tke gweet words, "Daddy, I'm glad you're k
...our parents lor tkeir prayers, w^eekly pkone calls, and words or encouraiieinent.
...tke raculty and start or Tulane University bckool or Medicine.
...all or my triends and classmates. I leave you untn tkese words:
AGREED
There is a destiny thai makes us brothers;
AoHc goes his way alone:
/\ji that we send into the lives of others
Comes back into our own.
-Uuwiti Aiarkltani
^ \
^..4
V
Sherri J. Mann
Powell, OH
Miami University
BA, 1992
5
D. Patrick Martin
South Lake Tahoe, CA
University of California, Davis
BS, 1987
4M
1
'.^^Kf ^^^^^^^^^m^^^^^Smm
Jl
IS^^BB^^^^^Hh^^^HL^-'? ""'"^
^trr y
David Woodbridge Mathes
Hillsborough, CA
Vanderbilt University
|
BA, 1992
Christine Rita Medora
Princeton Junction, NJ
Tulane University
BS, 1992
MPH, 1996
Joseph Keith Melancon
Lafayette, LA
University of Southwestern
Louisiana
BS, 1990
Jeffrey Miller
Greeley, CO
Washington University,
St. Louis
BA, 1986
i«^
3b;
Nana Mizuguchi
Long Beach, CA
University of California,
Los Angeles
BS, 1992
Robert A. Mora
San Antonio, TX
St. Mary's University
BA, 1987
f^ Christopher E. Mottes
Rosemont, PA
Massachusetts Institute
of Technology
BS, 1990
Heather Melissa
Murphy-Lavdfg
Boulder Creek, CA
Tulane University
BS, 1991
Thanks to Mom & Dad,
for the Foundation.
Thanks to Megan,
for being the Best Friend ever.
Thanks to Camille,
for undying love.
And most of all,
Thanks to Pierre,
for more than anyone could imagine.
Love you all!
Heather
Shelley K. Nakamura
Glendale, AZ
University of Arizona
BS, 1992
A«M & SHE CLtv S Re^fOfcNCY MAP ) 995- 1 996 WO«LD TOUP
I
_u
Karin E. Netland
Orono, ME
Harvard University
AB, 1989
MPH & TM, 1996
Can four years in the-Bfiep South make a Yankee go straight? I pondered this question for months this year as
I considered whether I should theh'risk^rther contortion by staying on at Tulane for residency. I needed to know if
the essential Northerner was'resisj^iff tcrfhe fecund influences of our beloved New Orleans. Obvious mundane
changes had clearly taken roo^^^jpUj^ tenure - 1 call groups of people "y'all," I no longer fear for my life when a
stranger on the street s^»it(^^5^!f^«S^ethif%, I know what okra and merliton are, and 1 think I even care about the
fate of the Saints. Still, morg|QmdamenMli^^Jry^•
'**
" changes may have taken place and required some careful
reflection. Did I care^ for instant tf^tTuIah^^j^C^s STILL the only all male medical school fraternity in the
nation, or that a de^fttferoportion orm^^pgtients rJ^Kgiwas "doctor honey?" More importantly, can 1 now wake
.^^^mA^ coffee and cWonjr in lieu q^^^sgoiand Vi\ aldtZ I sat on my porch swing sipping an
s^Bane^OridJ^jOath my cud, imtfWjecalTStf&dfm horroi i i'-4irraaj|v' to my conversion.
i^ge my residfen^yto N^tx^^rleans ind to Inen tepjacc my Maine drivers
1 i y ^^ clam, I headed" off to the Dejj^tnKMil^^^jOjntor^V'el-ii.sles where I pro-mtl^
90 degree Rz/t-box before being told by m '
., ,Tj,^-?ilis proving maM had in fact resided in New
time. I suH?e^hom.(S^chan§ed the narfits^mder WH^^he utility bi"
^^^'
to the DXfti^viffwtEiWrfext issued bilK two weeks later."%5Qthis tii
Sl^wa loc^te^vers license (thisrtrato of infoH0a
" r^l;i^^dngjhat/J>^^%inde^^li\^s^i>fiya^artment
rettygooiklQ* ine DMVaf^as not impressed.
noughy^Rfeft witK .a pfe^ure of 200 /
el5j!_^e0T>lg d'Hd was
up with a cup of
ice tea and chewin
A few y'
license with oi(^,
ceeded to wait
license witl
replace {?fl,
ant EJMV
from
I was basic
the number was
where I spent the day
security numbers and that
only needed a copy of a card and
naught, I was sent home to wait for an
unregistered vehicle and thought a lot about
k^Jjjtfi^lji^a'montl
'e an^V^y, I tht
s, durin
j^act tha
difbioii,
social
Id not be given a
afjdc^x>eriod of
C nome
leans tor an ag'
rom nu:«B»am mate's^|^^^^'tf;fotu rned
xpireciarfd f con Id not
ent,'but eqti-ally pleas-with
a dictated letter
time required, and that
, and sijnply knowing
levant-federal office
uter. record of social
dyjiad a number and I
pferodactyl. All for
tickets for driving an
S breakdown for the
(auisiana driver. When my
:^''copies of my bills, the
es made by my mother to
() you wear glasses?" the
I did, then was struck with
out them. 1 then begged,
[is I was in such a hurry, I
letter from
the DMV and pre
official inquired. 1 an
the nauseating realization
pleaded for him to not test my vis
began to twitch and tears streamed down my face. "Don't worry
baby," he assured me and generously and completely illegally
documented my vision as 20/20. As a smile began to creep across
my face and a sort of joy suffused my being, I realized with a bilter-swect
satisfaction that in my relief at having found a corrupt ofliii.il,
I had at last been infused with the true spirit of Louisiana.
/?c/r r ->>//y^r ^^ ^^'^ "ii^^ Fiv a' "r^^^^'^J (^
^3^^^^^3Bk _ i
Dominic Nguyen
Tallahassee, FL
Duke University
BS, 1991
Christine M. Oehler
Huntington, NY
University of Notre Dame
BA, 1992
The Class of 1996
Extended Family
From Top (L to R): Camille Lavoie, Logan Herrfeldt, Zachary Klein, Zachary
Kiein, Sarah Liebkeman, Karina Mora and Camille Lavoie, Logan Bass,
Zachary Vandenberg, Wesley Dent, Haley and Payton MacDonald, Emily
Claire Archer
•» «^
Robyn Theresa Kramer Patton
Downers Grove, IL
The University of Chicago
BA, 1990
rhank vou to mv parents for laying the foundation. Tliank you to my grandparents, aunts, and uncles for expressions of pride and confidence,
rhank you to Susan for coaching and cheering. Tliank you to Leslie, Lorrie, & Mark for commiseration, levity, encouragement, and joy.
Vtost (rf all - thank you, thank you, thank you, (Jougks - my love - for your uiiL-ndin;; siipporl, llir l.ilc ii]);liK drillinj^ before ,i lest, always a dry shoulder to
ciy on, ycjur wit, charm, wLsclcjnn, and cleverness, ycjur constant belief in my ability to dream - and achieve - 1 1 u •
i m|x )ssible dream, and especially - your love.
Elizabeth M. Pauley
West Chester, PA
I Virginia Polytechnic
Institute
BS, 1992
ilM
Christine M. Perry
Nevada City, CA
University of California,
Santa Barbara
BA, 1991
Scott Plotkin
New Orleans, LA
Harvard University
BA, 1991
Class of 1996
Sweethearts
Part II
William L. Pumell
Baton Rouge, LA
Louisiana State University
BS, 1991
#^ ^-s
f^ f^
Hope Rasque
Florissant, MO
New Mexico State University
BS, 1988
Joseph W. Raziano
Plantation, FL
University of Miami
BS, 1992
Stacey J. Robinson
Red Bluff, CA
California State University,
Long Beach
BS, 1992
'this page is dedicated to my family.
Thanks for all the love and support
and for helping make all of this possible.
Excerpts from the Class of 1996 Cadaver Ball Program
Abra Cadaver
GET THE LATEST FUNKY CONTRIBUTION FROM
THE RED HOT HISTO PEPPERS--
lAIJ SUGAR mK M/viJiii:.
Includes Ihc following hils:
"The Deeper It Goes, Ihc Belter It Gels"
"Funky Cold Adrenal"
"Liver Let Die" (Mascoiro/Axl Rose duct)
"Do You See What I See" (Dr. Jeter Specials)
"Puiple Brain" (Strange Pyramidal Cell Stain)
"You're Never Gonna Get It" (Anatomy Dcpt. Chorus)
Top Ten Complaints of Tulane Medical Students
10. Missed free food at lunchtime talk - had to listen to speaker anyway.
9. Feedback from lecture hall microphone disturbs REM sleep.
8. Old undergraduate friends keep calling to talk about what a great time they're having.
7. Had to build exact replica of 7th floor lecture hall at home to cure insomnia problem.
6. Lost secret decoder ring that deciphers Dr. Cohen's lectures.
5. Despite months of looking stupid, unable to grow sideburns like Dr. Kirby's.
4. Nestor no longer single.
3. Proposal rejected to install 4000 slot machines in student lounge to cover tuition.
2. Life sucks.
1. Histo stool back.
Top Ten Reasons to Attend TUlane
10. Let kid brother fill out application form.
9. Couldn't get into a U.S. medical school.
8. Friends needed a place to stay for Mardi Gras.
7. Heard Paul Prudhomme was the chef in the medical school cafeteria.
6. Never met anyone from California before.
5. Special cashier in cafeteria for medical students.
4. Keg party in Tomlinson's office.
3. World renowned biochemistry department.
2. Needed to medicate genetic cayenne pepper deficiency.
1. FBI witness relocation program.
132
Appendix
Here are a few additions lo ihc pathology icxl. They will be covered in depth in the 1993
pathology course.
Cohen's Aphasia : Lesions in the association cortex that produce an inability lo talk in an organized
manner. Symptoms include incoherent babble.
Ayettey's Syndrome: Characterized by severe atrophy of the brain. This highly contagious di.seasc,
endemic to Ghana, has recently been eradicated in North America.
Phlegm of Phelps : Transient. Characterized by low attention span and lung degeneration. May
come and go many times within the course of a lab period.
Baricos Brain Lock : Psychological illness in which many contradicting beliefs may be held
simultaneously. Incurable.
Neil Brown Personality Mutation : A rapid process. Sex-linked.
Genetic Cafllcne Deficiency : An autosomal dominant di.seasc particularly prevalent in certain
oppressed ethnic groups such as medical students.
Hills Babies : Offspring found in Jais on third lloor Results from holding laser pointer to clo.se lo
gonads.
Rodenhauser Rash : An allergic skin reaction provoked by prolonged exposure lo gray dye.
Ncuro Information Storage Deficiency : A seasonal disorder that often appears in early March.
"7th Floor Syndi'omc" : Exaggerated lumbar and thoracic curvatures of the s|:)ine, failing vision,
and vitamin D deficiency. May have some narcoleptic symptoms.
Histology Ha I luci nations : A form of group hypnosis in which large populations experience
predetermined visual hallucinations which they are tested on.
Viral Oljscssivc-Compulsivc Disorder: Alfccls the same populations as "7th b'loor Syndi'ome".
Resides in dorsal root ganglion cells and reappears periodically.
Fiiliginelleclomy : Inllamed organs removed and Iranspoilcd lo higher allitutle.
13;»
Janet Marie Ross
Wilmington, MA
Wellesley College
BA, 1989
Steven Mark Ross
Weston, MA
Tulane University
BA, 1987
lY Dammit, Janet.
^ ^
Stephen E. Ryan
New Orleans, LA
University of Notre Dame
BS, 1988
BA, 1988
Special thanks to all my family
Rosie and Jerry R. Ryan,
Marion and Jerry L. Ryan,
Barbara and Sim Gullett,
Tom and Elizabeth, Cathy,
John and Julie,
Joe and Stephanie,
Margaret and Rick.
Meredith L. SaganWhitney
Boulder, CO
Tulane University
BA, 1992
r-.
';'^. 'i V.--
W #:
•/
^kiju jii y
Farzin Samadi
Los Angeles, CA
University of California, Irvine
BS, 1991
Francis L. Sandoval
Denver, CO
University of Denver
BS, 1991
MS, 1992
Kenneth Qiristopher Sands
Middletown, NY
Duke University
BS, 1992
Jose Angel Santiago, Jr.
Bronx, NY
Xavier University of Louisiana
BS, 1990
PhD, 1995 '^
'f^
9\'
1
*
Luanne Elizabeth Schocket
Tucson, AZ
j
Cornell University
|
BA, 1991
„-L
Art Schoenstadt
Salinas, CA
University of California, Davis
BS, 1992
M^m
Linda F. Shapiro
Denver, CO
University of Southern California
BS, 1992
Glenn Patrick Shields
Mt. Vernon, IL ^
Milliken University f^
BS, 1992
Eric Louis Smith
Jamestown, CA
University of California, Davis
BS, 1992
EXCERPTS FROM...
THE HOUSE OF GOD
BY SAMUEL SHEM
LAWS OF THE HOUSE OF GOD
I. GOMERS DON'T DIE.
n. GOMERS GO TO GROUND.
m. AT A CARDIAC ARREST, THE FIRST PROCEDURE IS TO TAKE YOUR OWN PULSE.
IV. THE PATIENT IS THE ONE WITH THE DISEASE.
V. PLACEMENT COMES FIRST
VI. THERE IS NO BODY CAVITY THAT CANNOT BE REACHED WITH A #14 NEEDLE AND A GOOD
STRONG ARM.
Vn. AGE + BUN - LASIX DOSE.
Vm. THEY CAN ALWAYS HURT YOU MORE.
DC. THE ONLY GOOD ADMISSION IS A DEAD ADMISSION.
X. IF YOU DON'T TAKE A TEMPERATURE, YOU CAN'T FIND A FEVER.
XI. SHOW ME A BMS WHO ONLY TRIPLES MY WORK AND I WILL KISS HIS FEET
Xn. IF THE RADIOLOGY RESIDENT AND THE BMS BOTH SEE A LESION ON A CHEST X-RAY, THERE
CAN BE NO LESION THERE.
Xm. THE DELIVERY OF MEDICAL CARE IS TO DO AS MUCH NOTHING AS POSSIBLE.
SPECIALTY
RAYS
ADVANTAGES
ss
DISADVANTAGES
Gomers.,
Dark offices, narcolepsy.
Damaged: gonads; 8 -fingered progeny.
Barium enemas and bowel runs.
GAS $$
PATH
DERM
OPHTHO
PSYCH
No live bodies.
Low malpractice premiums.
$$
Travel to sunny conventions.
Naked skin - attracdon.
Astronomical SS
Opportunity, daily, to tonnent GAS
NO GOMERS!
Never touch bodies except in sex-surrogate
therapies.
Voyeurism, perversion, eroticism,
auUxirodcism, polycroticism.
Easy on feci.
Long lunch hours.
Cure - alleged.
(many others;.
Gomers.
Boredom punctured by panic.
Astronomical malpractice premiums.
Noxious gases, producing bizarre personalities.
Contempt, daily, of surgeons.
Gomers (rare).
Dead bodies.
Smell of dead bodies and formalin-type picklers.
Basement office.
Contempt, daily, of all but odier pathologists.
Gomers.
Contagion.
Naked skin - repulsion.
Gomers.
Astronomical malpractice premiums.
Surgical internship required.
Occasional patient cai'c.
Hourly wage.
Hard on lumbar spine.
Multiple accu.salions from right-wingers, cf.
'communist', 'queer', 'pervert'.
(Contempt, daily, of other doctors except when
tliey are in (heiapy.
Gwendolyn Jill Sorosky
Claremont, CA
Claremont McKenna College
BA, 1991
Cheryl A. Stanski
Monmouth Junction, N]
Vanderbilt University
BS, 1992
Lorrie A. Strohecker
I
St. Louis, MO
I University of Missouri
i BA, 1985
Vanna Rae Sutherland
New Orleans, LA
Tulane University
BS, 1992
Stephanie Yvonne Talton
St. Louis, MO
Southern University, Baton Rouge
BS, 1990
MS, 1995
CHARITY-ESE
Bad blood Syphilis
High blood Hypertension
Lowblood Anemia
Sugar blood Diabetes mellitus
Yellow blood Jaundice
"I got short" Dyspnea
"Problems with my nature" Impotence
Fireballs of the Eucharist Uterine fibroids
Virginia Vagina
Cadillacs of the eyes Cataracts
Sick-as-hell anemia Sickle-cell anemia
De roaches of de liver Cirrhosis
Smilin' mighty Jesus Spinal meningitis
Technical shot Tetanus shot
Tecknus Tetanus
Indian fire Impetigo
Two buffaloes of the lungs Tuberculosis
Very close veins Varicose veins
Flea bites Phlebitis
Peanut butter balls Phenobarbital
Vomicking Vomiting
Clogs Blood clots
Contraptions Contractions
Trash in the throat Thrush
Adrian flutter Atrial flutter
Attack-acordia Tachycardia
Tacky cards Tachycardia
Subscriptions Prescriptions
MEDICAL DICTIONARY FOR THE
HOSPITAL ADMINISTRATOR
Antigen Uncle Jim's wife
Artery The study of paintings
Bacteria The back door of a cafeteria
Barium What doctors do when patients die
Benign What you are after you be eight
Bowel A letter like a, e, i, o, u
Cat Scan Searching for Kitty Kitty
Cauterize Made eye contact with her
Centigrade Mailed test scores
Cesarean Section A neighborhood in Rome
Cirrhosis An English knight
Coccyx An ill rooster
Colic A sheep dog
Coma A punctuation mark
Congenital Friendly
Cryosurgery Weeping after an operation
Cystogram A message sent to your sister
D&C Where Washington is
Dilate To live long
Enema Not a friend
Erogenous Inaccurate
Fester Quicker
Forceps A pair of biceps
Genital Not a Jew
CI Series Soldier baseball game
1 (angnail Coat hook
Heart Not soft
1 lygienc A greeting to Gene
Impotent Distinguished, well known
Intern The order in which doctors see patients
Iris The organization that collects taxes
Jugular A circus performer
Kidney A baby goat's leg joint
Labor Pain Getting hurt at work
Medical Staff A doctor's cane
Morbid A higher offer
Nitrates Cheaper than day rates
Node Was aware of
Outpatient A person who fainted
Palsy Getting very friendly
Pap Smear A fatherhood test
Pelvis A cousin of Elvis
Phlebotomy A flea on the buttocks
Pigment What Miss Piggy meant
Postoperative A letter carrier
Protein In favor of young people
Recovery Room A place to do upholstery
Rectum Dang near killed him
Seizure Roman emperor
Tablet A small table
Testicles An exam that makes you laugh
Tibia Abbreviation for "To be a"
Tumor An extra pair
Urine Opposite of you're out
Varicose Nearby
Vertigo What a lost child doesn't know
Megan Sanders-Tirone
Colorado Springs, CO
The Johns Hopkins
University
BS, 1992
Thomas Tirone
Reisterstown, MD
The Johns Hopkins
University
BA, 1992
MORE EXCERPTS FROM THE CAPAVER g>ALL PROGRAM...
Multiple Choice - Choose the correct answer
1. Which of the rollovviiig did not happen to Dr. Ayettey on his return to Ghana?
a) arrested by customs police for smuggling hot computer.
b) wiped out half of West Africa with Ebola New Orleans virus.
c) woke up during the flight home with a dry mouth and realized he lost his salvation.
d) plane disappeared over posterior bermudal triangle.
2. Dr. Rodenhauser's favorite color is:
a) red
b) yellow
c) bJuc
d) all of the above
3. Why is Dr. Hamori teaching in America?
a) exiled from Russia after failed coup attempt.
b) was a vei^y "eager" child.
c) on a secret mission from KGB to confuse young, capitalistic, imperialist minds.
d) visa to Transylvania was denied.
4. Dr. Hill suffers from myelocncephaloacranioccphaly. Which oi' the following symptoms would you expect to
observe?
a) tendency to be nonspecific in his specific definition of specificity.
b) pretzel shaped aorta.
c) strange feeling of swimming in a jar of formaldehyde.
d) visual spectrum limited to blond wavelengths.
5. Which of the following does Dr. Kirby grow on his farm?
a) corn
b) wheat
c) barley
d) rhubarb
e) sideburns
6. Dr. Yates' fondest memory of childhood is;
a) the good ole 8 year old stream.
b) playing that favorite blues 45 "There's One" on his broken record player.
c) the redhead next door.
d) gone.
7. Which of the following was Dr. Harlan's former job?
a) casino greeter
b) joke writer for David Letterman
c) advance scout for alien invasion force
d) stunt double for Weird Al Yankovich
8. Neuroanatomy is;
a) about as much fim as drinking a cup of broken glass.
b) a secret government experiment researching ways to break the morale of enemy soldiers.
c) only made bearable by Dr. Kreisman's hysterical antics and wacky gags.
d) of absolutely no use in altractuig members of the opposite sex.
9. Dr. Anderson's favorite outfit consists of (choose all that apply);
a) Wonder Woman undcroos.
b) leather socks (only).
c) bow ties.
d) American flag bodysuit.
156 f
.La
Noteset Gems
(Match each quote with quoter)
A. "...but was forced to flee Padua for fear of being burned at the steak...
perhaps we will never face the threat of being burned at the steak.
B. ''Bare with me..."
C. "The different points on the trace represent different moments during
excitation of the heart and they appear differently because of the spread of
the electrical activity to the different parts of the heart at different instances.
D. "Type foer collagen..."
E. "Farting mice..."
F. "In this it has a nucleus, and up to here it is capable of dividing transient...
can give rise to this or to another type of these, and this is what dividing
transient is."
G. "Add 1/4 teaspoon of "basil ganglion". -
Neil Canby
Michelle Zerwas
Mateen Aliniazee
Christine Medora
Scott Benjamin
Linda Shapiro
Molly Courtright
Meredith Sagan-Whitney
Match the Faculty Member with Secret Identity
A. Curious George Dr. Kirby
B. Sasquatch Dn Baricos
C. Dracula Dr Cohen
D. Mel Brooks Dr. Harlan
E. Michael Dukakis Dr Stjernholm
F. Albert Einstein / Mark Twain hybrid Dr Hamori
Madame Cusick's Crystal daW
1 see a man with wild long gray hair, sitting lotus style in a dimly lit cave, preaching to the wind on the
woes of being tardy. I can just make out his worde... "See nature spewing and frothing, its mad
spermatic bubbles endlessly spilling out and smashing in that inhuman round of waste, rot , and cavnaqe.
From the jammed glassy cells of sea roe to the feathery spores poured into the air from bursting
green pods, the first years are a festering hornet's nest of aggression and oi/erkill." There is a bright
flash - the ball becomes cloudy- wait! Upon a sudden 1 have a new vision, there are many books, the
image rem\nde me of the lower level of a familiar library. I see a small dingy corner room with a video
recorder and two d\5t\nqu\5hed moustached men, a six pack of beer hanging from their greedy claws.
There is an \maq^ on a tc\ev\5\on screen in the room... I hear voices - voices 1 say - "Joe, put in tlie jjcIvic
exam videotape, I'm bored of the breast exam." "5ut Joe, I've already seen the pelvic exam tape
twenty times!" "Ah, hell, forget it, let's go to floe's." The two men walk off; the image fades... There is
a large metal box in a hallway, a closet of sorts, with a sign -
1 can pet make it out - 'Property of
Rodney Sparks." What's this! My ball is vibrating, there is some sort of pounding, boogie woogie beat
emanating from the closet. A lowly student approaches the 1?on. He asks, "Does tlic chordae tympani
ncr/e prov\de taste?" A booming voice bursts out in synchrony wir.h the opening of the closet doors,
rcvea\\n<^ a man with baseball bat cocked to the side, black leather pants, and a large gold nameplate
eadinq^ '5PARKY P" - "YO YO, what's happcnin' little anatomy budrly, you don't liave to know that,
(0, let's rap - you know MAN!".
157
David M. Tucker
Abilene, TX
Hardin-SimmonsUniversity
BBA, 1989
Kent B. Turner
Shreveport, LA ^'
Vanderbilt University
BS, 1992
Daniel P. Tveit
Woodinville, WA
University of Washington
BS, 1992
Payam Vahedifar
Santa Monica, CA
University of California, Los Angeles
BS, 1992
Jena S. VandenBerg
Seattle, WA
University of Washington
BA, 1992
Veronica L. Ventura
Walnut Creek, CA
University of California, Davis
BS, 1992
CAPE POINT
34 21 24' SOUTH LATITUDE
lg29'SrEAST LONGITUDE
SOUTH AFRICA
Paul Joseph Waguespack
Baton Rouge, LA
University of Notre Dame
BS, 1989
John D. Waldron
Glendale, CA
University of California, Davis
BS, 1991
A^
Sean Daryl Wengroff
West Palm Beach, FL
Brandeis University
BA, 1992
MPH, 1996
Qiristopher Lee Westervelt
Camp Verde, AZ
University of Notre Dame
BS, 1990
Louis Anthony Whitworth
Fresno, CA
University of California, Berkeley
BA, 1991
Rodrek Emilio Williams
New Orleans, LA
Xavier University
BS, 1989
I
^^m
^^^^^^^^^^m 1
^^
Leslie Brooke Wilson
St. Louis, MO
Newcomb College of
Tulane University
BS, 1992
Michael K. Wilson
New Orleans, LA
Louisiana State University
BS, 1985
Michael WoU
Randolph, NJ
Notre Dame University
BS, 1988
—J[r lr^^-^4^^^
Eric H. C. Wong
Honolulu, HI
Tulane University
BS, 1991
Ann Miller Woodward
Weston, MA
Colgate University
BA, 1992
X^
Jason Murphy Wuttke
Douglaston, NY
SUNY Binghamton
BA, 1991
MPH, 1996
Kisa Young
Kentfield, CA
University of Colorado
BA
MPH, 1996
Michelle Ann Zerwas
Atherton, CA
Jniversity of California, San Diego
BS
ikf swear by Apollo the physician, Aesculapius, Hygieia, and Panacea, and by God and by
whatever I hold most sacred, that, according to my ability and judgment, I will keep this Oath
and this stipulation ~ I will look upon those who shall have taught me this Art even as one of
my parents.
I will share my substance with them, and 1 will supply their necessities if they be in need.
I will regard their offspring on the same footing as my own brethren, and I will teach them
this art, if they shall wish to learn it, without fee or covenant.
I will impart a knowledge of the Art by precept, by lecture, and by every mode of teaching
not only to my own children but to the children of those who have taught me, and to disciples
bound by covenant and oath, according to the Law of Medicine, but to none other.
The regimen I adopt shall be for the benefit of my patients according to my ability and
judgment and I will abstain from whatever is deleterious and mischievous.
I will seek to inform my patients ftilly about their illness and prognosis, and will always
remember that the final decision regarding their own life rests with the patient.
I will regard my patients always as fellow human beings and will do everything possible to
preserve their dignity.
With purity and with holiness I will pass my life and practice my Art.
Whatsoever things I see or hear concerning the life of the people in my attendance, on the
sick or even apart therefrom, which ought not to be noised abroad, I will keep silence thereon,
counting such things to be sacred secrets.
While 1 continue to keep this Oath unviolated, may it be granted to me to enjoy life and the
practice of the Art, respected by all, in all times.
But should I trespass and violate this Oath, may the reverse be my lot.
Election to Alpha Omega Alpha is a distinction that
accompanies a physician throughout his or her
career. Especially for the young physician, the
society' provides a forum for the exchange of ideas, as
well as a source of valuable contacts. Members can
be elected as students, graduates, or faculty of an
affiliated mstitution, or because of distinguished
achievement m any field, on an honorary basis.
Elections in the first three categories are carried out
by the individual chapters. Chapters elect
undergraduate members fi^om students in their last
Uvo years of medical school Scholastic excellence as
well as integrity, capacity for leadership, compassion,
and fairness in dealmg with one's colleagues are
considered, and the number of students elected ft'om
each class may not exceed one-sixth of those
expected to be graduated. The students elected to the
society are men and women who, in judgement of the
local chapter, have shown promise of becoming
leaders m their profession.
Faculty Member:
*C Lynn Besch, M.D. (Medicine)
Resident Members:
*Ennco Ascani III, M.D. (Ob-Gyn)
Michclc T. Longo, M.D..M.P. (Neurology)
*David Farhadi, M D ,M HA. (Medicine)
Alumnus Member:
Scott Kcllcrmann, M.D.,M.P.H.T.M.
(Class of! 971)
AOA Members, 1995-1996 Election:
Tulane Stars and Bars Chapter
Medical Student (Class of 1996)
* Charles Waher Bouch
*Mary Elizabeth Byers
*Neil Eric Canby
*Judson Howard Cook
*Edward Lewis Dent
*Jennifer Crawford Evans
*Philip Clark Fitzpatnck
*Jason Chnstopher Gilster
(Secretary-Treasurer)
Howard Elliot Jeffries
Walter D. Liebkemann
(Vice-President)
Diane Margaret Lovell
David Woodbridge Mathes
Christopher Eugene Mottes
* Nana Mizuguchi
Carl Frank Palumbo III
Chrisitine Michelle Perry
Stacy Jean Robinson
Thomas A. Tirone
Huy Quoc Tran
(President)
Jena Stephanie Vanednberg
John Darrell Waldron
Anthony Louis Whitworth
Michael Murphy Woll
Jason Murphy Wuttkc
WHEN I GROW UP . .
L to R: Cheryl Stanski, Frank Fischer, Megan Sanders, lloward Jettnes, Neil Lanby, Melanie Fieselman,
Grace Chun, Luanne Schocket, Linda Shapiro, Chris Westervelt, Meredith SaganWhitney.
.>b^
W> iC'
to R: Joe Raziano, Rodrek Williams, Christine I'frry, Drew Landers, Pete Clark, Jeff Behar, Nancy Garrett,
Paul Waguespack, Neil Brown.
L to R: Stacey Robinson, Greg Huhn, Robyn Kramer, Elizabeth Pauley, Page Griffin, Jeff Miller, Lorrie
Strohecker, Mike Wilson, Aaron Charles, Hope Rasque, Alan Chambers, Shelly Lovitt.
»-^
i
r i5
( **
?
y
t
1 R: Mark Chastain, hric Cnggs, Bryan Frain, Scott I'lotkin, \irk Smith, Heather Murphy-Lavoie, Fat Martin,
Jose Santiago, Rick MacDonald.
i
4
i
L to R: William Purnell, Brannon Aden, Mattie Foroozesh, Melanie Fieselman, Al Lewis, Kisa Fuchs Young, Keri
Sands, Tom Cawthon, Shelley Nakamura, Ann Woodward.
.L
" R: Karin .N'etland, Janet Ross, Tunicid diron, hric KIcm, Chilip Fitzpatrick, Tim ( luirch, Mitzi Jackson, Megan
Lynch, Enoch I luang, Mark Knower.
-*»»n
<"->.
L to R: Jena Vandenburg, Steven Ross, Sherri Mann, Keith Melancon, Ed Dent, Melissa Cnota, Jason Wuttke,
Joseph Cooper, Walt Liebkemann.
A
4
^ms;^
ifi /i ^^
/
;
kK J
" R: Jennifer fivans, I im l^rrera, Chrislme (Jeliler, I'eggy Chen, Stephanie Talton, Sean Allan, David Tucker,
Nestor Delgado, Myrtle Hoover, Diane Elgin.
L to R: Kent Turner, Alex Allen, Debbie Glupczynski, Leslie Wilson, Frances Sandoval, Marc Futernick,
David Mathes, Michelle Zerwas, Sean Wengroff.
'<: Gwen Sorosky, Veronica Ventura, Matt f^cbnam, Allison f lerman, Eric Wong, Bill Archer, Wes Bryan,
Carl Palumbo, Suzanne Hart.
I
/ -^i&
/^:
L to R: Tom Tirone, Art Apolinario, Art Schoenstadt, John Waldron, Payam Vahedifar, Mary Byers, Tom Bendi
Sheri Cheung, Cami Ullah.
' • K: Pam Ceddis, Drew Landers, Russell Clark, Lisa Lee, Steve Ryan, Far/.in Samadi, Vanna Sutherland,
Mateen Alinia/.ee, Mark Bocchicchio.
The Art of Pimping
IT'S HARD work becoming a revered attending physician in a
university hospital. The task daunts the newly appointed
junior attending as he strides down the corridor of his first
ward with his first team. Oh, he's made some changes in
anticipation of his new position. He's wearing a long coat now,
an all-cotton coat with razor-sharp creases and knit buttons.
The stained, shrunken polyester white pants and tennis shoes
have given way to gray, light wool slacks with a cuff and
pohshed loafers. Framed certificates bear testimony to his
intelligence and determination. He should be ready to take
the helm of his ward team, but he's not. Something's missing,
something important, something closer to art than to science.
When physicians talk about the "art of medicine" they usually
mean healing, or coping with uncertainty, or calculating their
federal income taxes. But there's one art this new attending
needs to learn before all others: the art of pimping.
Pimping occurs whenever an attending poses a series of
very difficult questions to an intern or student. The earUest
reference to pimping is attributed to Harvey in London in
1628. He laments his students' lack of enthusiasm for learning
the circulation of the blood: "They know nothing of Natural
Philosophy, these pin-heads. Dnmkards, sloths, their belUes
filled with Mead and Ale. that I might see them pimped!"
In 1889, Koch recorded a series of "Piimpfrage" or "pimp
questions" he would later use on his rounds in Heidelberg.
Unpublished notes made by Abraham Flexner on his visit to
Johns Hopkins in 1916 yield the first American reference:
"Rounded with Osier today. Riddles house officers with ques-tions.
Like a Catling gun. Welch says students call it 'pimping.'
Dehghtfiil."
On the surface, the aim of pimping appears to be Socratic
instruction. The deeper motivation, however, is political.
Proper pimping inculcates the intern wath a profound and
abiding respect for his attending physician while ridding the
intern of needless self-esteem. Furthermore, after being
pimped, he is drained of the desire to ask new questions—
questions that his attending may be unable to answer. In the
heat of the pimp, the young intern is hammered and wrought
into the framework of the ward team. Pimping welds the
hierarchy of academics in place, so the edifice of medicine may
be erected securely, generation upon generation. Of course,
being hammered, wrought, and welded may, at times, be
somewhat unpleasant for the intern. Still, he enjoys the atten-tion
and comes to equate his initial anguish with the aches and
pains an athlete suffers during a period of intense
conditioning.
Despite its long history and crucial importance in training.
From the Department of Medicine, University of Pittsburghi (Pa).
pimping as a medical art has received little attention fi*om tht
educational establishment. A recent survey reveals that fewer
than 1 in 20 attending physicians have had any formal training
in pimping. In most American medical schools, pimping is
covered haphazardly during the third-year medical clerkship
or is relegated to a fourth-year elective. In a 1985 poll, over
95% of program directors admitted that the pimping skills of
their trainees were "seriously inadequate." It comes as no
surprise, then, that the newly appointed attending must teach
himself how to pimp. It is to this most junior of attendings,
therefore, that I offer the following brief guide to the art of
pimping.
Pimp questions should come in rapid succession and should
be essentially unanswerable. They may be grouped into five
categories:
1. Arcane points of history. These facts are not taught in
medical school and are irrelevant to patient care— perfect for
pimping. For example, who performed the first lumbar pimc-ture?
Or, how was syphihs named?
2. Tfeleology and metaphysics. These questions lie outside
the realm of conventional scientific inquiry and have tradition-ally
been addressed only by medieval philosophers and the
editors of the National Enquirer. For instance, why are some
organs paired?
3. Exceedingly broad questions. For example, what role do
prostaglandins play in homeostasis? Or, what is the differen-tial
diagnosis of a fever of unknown origin? Even if the intern
begins making good points, after 4 or 5 minutes he can be cut
off and criticized for missing points he was about to mention.
These questions are ideally posed in the final minutes of
rounds while the team is charging down a noisy stairwell.
4. Eponyms. These questions are favored by many old-timers
who have assiduously avoided learning any new devel-opments
in medicine since the germ theory. For instance,
where does one find the semilunar space ofTraube? Or, whose
name is given to the dancing uvula of aortic regurgitation?
5. Technical points oflaboratory research. Even when gen-eral
medical practice has become a dim and distant memory,
the attending physician-investigator still knows the details of
his research inside and out. For instance, how active are
leukocyte-activated killer cells with or without interleukin 2
against sarcoma in the mouse model? Or, what base sequence
does the restriction endonuclease £'coRI recognize?
Such pimping should do for the third-year student what the
Senate hearings did for Robert Bork. The intern, in contrast,
is a seasoned veteran and not so easily rattled. Years of
relentless pimping have taught him two defenses: the dodge
and the bluff.
Dodging avoids the question, wasting time as well as a
valuable pimp question. The two most common forms ofdodg-
JAMA, July 7. l989-\toi 262, No. 1 The Art of Pimping— Brancati 89
ing are (1) to answer the question with a question and (2) to
answer a different question. For example, the intern is asked
to explain the pathophysiology of thrombosis secondary to the
lupus anticoagulant. He first recites the clotting cascade, then
recalls the details of a lupus case he admitted last month, and
closes by asking whether pulse-dose steroids are indicated for
lupus nephritis. The experienced attending immediately diag-noses
this outfwuring as a dodge, grabs the intern by the
scruff of the neck, and rubs his nose back in the original pimp.
A bluff, unfortunately, is much more damaging than a
dodge. Allowed to stand, a bluff promulgates a lie while
undermining the academic hierarchy by suggesting that the
intern has nothing more to learn from his attending. Bluffs
weaken the very fabric ofAmerican medicine, threatening our
livelihood and our way of life. Like outlaws in a Clint Eastwood
movie, bluffs must be shot on sight— no due process, no
Miranda Act, no starry-eyed liberal notions of openness or
dialogue—just righteous retribution.
Bluffs fall into three readily discernible categories:
1. Hand waving. These bluffs are stock phrases that refer
to hot topics in biomedicine without supplying detail or expla-nation.
For example, "It's a membrane transport phenome-non"
or 'The effect is mediated by prostaglandins." In many
institutions, they may evolve directly from the replies of
Grand Rounds speakers to questions from the audience.
2. Feigned erudition. The intern's answer, though without
substance, suggests an intimate understanding of the litera-ture
and a cautiousness bom of experience. "Hmmm ... to
my knowledge, that question has not been examined in a
prospective controlled fashion" is a common form. Frequent-ly,
the bluff is accompanied by three automatisms: clearing of
the throat, rapid fluttering of the eyelids and tongue, and
chewing on the temples of the eyeglasses. This triad, when
full-blown, will make the intern bear a sudden resemblance to
William Buckley and is virtually pathognomonic.
3. Higher authority. The intern attributes his answer to the
teaching of a particular superior. When the answer is refuted,
the blame of ignorance comes to rest on the higher authority,
not on the obedient, accepting intern . The strength ofthe bluff
def)ends on just whom is quoted. An intern quoting a junior
resident about pathophysiology is every bit as cogent as Colo-nel
Qaddafi quoting Ayatollah Khomeini about international
law. An intern from an Ivy League medical school quoting the
"training" he received on his medical clerkship goes over like
Dan Quayle explaining the Bill of Rights at an ACLU conven-tion.
The shrev/d intern, however, will quote his Chairman of
Medicine or at lea-st a division chief, pushing the nontenured
attending to the brink of political calamity. Did the chairman
actually say tkall The attending is powerless to refute the
statement until he is certain.
Indeed, a good bluff is hard to handle. Sometimes the
intem'rs bluff sounds better to the ward team than the attend-ing's
correct answer. Sometimes it sounds belter to the at-tending
himself. Ultimately, the cunning intern is best dis-couraged
from bluffing by aversi\'e training. Specifically, each
time he bluffs successfully, the attending should counter by
inducing Sudden Intern Disgrace (SID). SID is induced in two
ways:
1. Question the intern's ability to take a history. This tech-nique
depends on the phenomenon ofhistorical drift. That is, a
patient's story will reliably undergo a significant change in the
8- or 16-hour interval between admission and attending
rounds. The attending need only go to the bedside and ask the
same questions the intern did the night before. Now the entire
case is seen in a light different than that cast by the intern's
assessment. Yesterday's right upper quadrant cramping be-comes
right-sided pleuritic chest pain. Yesterday's ill-defined
midepigastric "burning" becomes crushing substernal heavi-ness
radiating to the arm and jaw. Suddenly, the intern is
disgraced. He will never bluff again.
2. Question the intern's compulsiveness. In less rigorous
programs, this is easy. Did the intern examine the peripheral
blood smear and the urine sediment himself ? If the intern
does routinely examine body fluids, a more methodical ap-proach
is required. In this case, results of the following tests,
procedures, and examinations may be requested in rapid
succession: Hemoccult slide test, urine electrolytes, bedside
cold agglutinins and serum viscosity, slit-lamp examination,
Schi0tz' tonometry. Gram's stain of the buffy coat, transtra-cheal
aspiration, anoscopy, rigid sigmoidoscopy, and indirect
laryngoscopy. Once the attending discovers a test or examina-tion
left unperformed, he asks the intern why this obviously
crucial point was neglected. (The tension may be heightened
at this point by frequent use of the word "cavalier. ") The
intern's response will generally revolve around time con-straints
and priorities in diagnostic evaluation. The attend-ing^
s rejoinder: did the intern eat, sleep, or void last night? The
scrupulous intern at once infers that he has placed his own
needs before the needs of his patient. Suddenly, he is dis-graced.
He will never bluff again.
Clearly, pimping— good pimping— is an art. There are
styles, approaches, and a few loose rules to guide the novice,
but pimping is learned in practice, not theory. Despite its long
and glorious history, pimping is in danger of becoming a lost
art. Increased specialization, the rise of the HMO, and DRG-based
financing are probably to blame, as they are for most
problems. The burgeoning budget deficit, the changing demo-graphic
profile of the United States, the Carter Administra-tion,
inefficiency at the Pentagon, and intense competition
from Japan have each played a role, though less directly.
Against this mighty array ofhistorical forces stands the belea-guered
junior attending armed only with training, wit, and
the determination to pimp. It won't be easy to turn back the
clock and restore the art of pimping to its former grandeur. I
only hope my guide will help.
Frederick L. Brancati, MD
JAMA. July 7. 1989- Vol 262. No 1 The Art of Pimping — Brancati
Administration
John C. LaRosa, MD
Chancellor, TMC
Neal A. Vanselow, MD
Former Chancellor
James J. Corrigan, MD
Dean of School of Medicine
N. Kevin Krane, MD
Vice Dean for Academic Affairs
Paul Rodenhauser, MD
Associate Dean of Admissions
& Curriculum Management
l^'Jl
James S. Storer, MD
Associate Dean for Clinical
Affairs &GME
Medical Director, CHNO
Wallace K. Tomlinson, MD
Associate Dean for Student Affairs
A. Cherrie Epps, PhD
Associate Dean of Student
Services &MEdREP
Pamela Moore, PhD
Associate Dean ofGME
oseph C. Pisano, PhD
Associate Dean of Admissions,
Financial Aid & Curriculum
Management
Martin S. Litwin, MD
Associate Dean for FPP
Medical Director, TMC
Larry Baudoin, MBA
Associate Dean of Finance &
Administration
Office of Admissions
Office of Student Affairs
MEdREP
The Basic Sciences ... 1st year
Department of Anatomy
Department of Biochemistry
Department of Physiology
. . . 2nd year
Department of Microbiology & Immunology
Department of Pathology
Department of Pharmacology
The Clinical Years . •
.
Department of Pediatrics
Department of Obstetrics & Gynecology
Department of Neurology & Psychiatry
.^^
Department of Medicine
Department of Surgery
Roberta Lottinger, MD
Class of 1996 Sponsor
Traditionally, the members of the
graduating class select two sponsors
from among the faculty to guide them
through and help them celebrate the
completion of their fourth year. The
Class of 1996 was honored to have Dr.
Roberta Lottinger and Dr. William H.
Robichaux serve in this capacity.
Individually, they earned our respect
as doctors and our admiration as
teachers; together they have given the
class much support, advice, and — of
course ~ bacchanalian parties.
Dr. Roberta Lottinger surely qualifies
for the classification of at least T20,
since she has done all of her post-secondary
schoolwork at Tulane,
from being a wide-eyed undergradu-ate
at Newcomb College to serving in
her current position as an associate
professor in the Department of Ob-stetrics
and Gynecology. Stories
about her love for her work are end-less,
but the fact that she has pictures
of, and can remember every name of
every child she has delivered repre-sents
volumes. When not bringing
new life into the world or teaching,
she enjoys the company of her hus-band
Tom — a carpenter, who built
the house the live in — and their son
Andrew, who is three years old.
'S'-akj
William H. RobichaiDQMD
Class of 1996 Sponsor
Dr. William H. Robichaux's eclectic
background, which includes a
degree in modern literature from
the Universite de Lyon and a medi-cal
doctorate from Louisiana Medi-cal
Center, serves him well in his
current calling as assistant profes-sor
in the Department of Pathology.
In lectures, Dr. Robichaux often
inserted trumpet riffs and Oreos
between clever mnemonics for
remembering sphingomyelinase
deficiency and Lesch-Nyhan Syn-drome.
He has also appeared
regularly on the Music and Medi-cine
Society stage, usually playing
accordion, or sometimes one of his
many other instruments. When not
entertaining and teaching in room
6065, he performs for his wife
Chris, and his three daughters
Vlarie Celeste, Susannah, and
Jtjsephine.
To our stellar sponsors, the Class of
1996 offers its deepest gratitude. It
has been a pleasure learning from
you, working and playing with
you!
Are you a Tl?
Wonders how people can tell he's a Tl by one whiff
Brain like a dry sponge
Bags under eyes ~ up with cadaver all night
Nasal mucosa sloughed secondary to formalin »|
Beads - received in orientation packet, doesn't know^
what they're used for
Plans to read ALL of these
School rules state ID badge must be worn at all times
Contact lenses melted to eyes due to formalin
Smile (doesn't know what he's gotten himself into)
(jiiiiiiLi pen and multicolored highlighters
(for color-coding notesets)
Potato chips ~ good source of antioxidants per Dr. Jete
Chronic treatment for "7062 narcolepsy"^
r^t
Are you a T2?
Blinded himself with ophthalmoscope looking for
patient's "red reflex"
Starts taking otoscope to bars on weekends "^ '"^^
"Hey, babe. Can I look in your ears?
Decidedly less fragrant than last year
Brain — saturated sponge
Can wear contact lenses again
Actually bought the instruments he was told to buy (by Dr
Szerlip), and then was informed he'd never use (by those all-knowing
T3s)
Liver -- showing fatty changes
Take home message from The Medical Interview: ]^
establish rapport, educate the patient, &collect data
No eye-opener required, actually sleeps
read the entire Human Behavior book and feels
it will adequately prepare him for anything
Chanty may throw his way
[jacket so clean it stands by itself
AT WORK: Basic Sciences
!1 fl
Pji%^^{y
^^^p-'-i^i^m^.^^' ^. .'^n
|iii» ^ Jk^
•'if »
miii ^-
y>^^
^^
RULES OF LOUNGE-
, BUS rMTRAYSOSCOSE OF TRASH
i BE COURTEOUS WHEN USINO TV OR PHONES
jRECvn E U5«G APPROPflLTE CONTAINERS
4 . VPROVED ITEMS HAY BE POSTED
a IS YOUR LOUNOE,
.EASE KEEP IT CtEAN
Are you a T3?
Brain — dazed and confused
Smile fading ~ knows what he's gotten himself into
TB mask ~ bought but never used
Drooping shoulders ~ fiill lab coat pockets weigh 3 1 lb.
Liver ~ alcoholic hepatitis
T3 eye-opener -- yesterday confused with specimen cup J^
Beeper -- pages self to feel important
Charity key in pocket to get out of locked stairwell if mugged
Bags under eyes ~ up all night on call
I
5 o'clock (am) shadow
1
e^ No ID badge - now only used to get into Reil;
i
I Stethoscope ~ always hears RRR s M/G/R
"Textbooks" - only buys pocket versions
I Lab coat - so grimy it stands by itself
Scut list (1 mile long, so far) in pock
Scrubs ~ has worn for past 3 days and nights
Are you a T4?
Took out additional loans tor imer^'i"
Joes --It's not just tor Fnoays am more
m
Lost stethoscope, forgot how to use it, orders echo ^^-
Brain - pickled
' Bags under eyes - up all night partying
'Studying" for Community Medicine rotation 0' #
Beeper - for emergencies, i.e. "meet me at Joes. STAT!
Arm sore trom vaccinations in preparation for tri{ to A
Tulane Bookstore Bestseller
i
Ak Suntan lotion
Studied more for SCUBA certification than for any other exam tnis year
AT WORK: Clinical Years
AT PLAY
;j^iii
m^
Not just pretty faces . .
.
1 P rf!fV-o.
1/^ ^
THE BEST OF NEW ORLEANS
W^: *
»;• ,^ ,
MORE OF THE BEST.
^ND SOME OF THE WORST
HI P^Mp^H
w 7 ^.* ^^^^1
1 9
1* J
. . . and yet more
class sweethearts .
.
y = .368x - TaLOOff" R-squared:-*ft985
As you can see, the data
fits almost perfectly on a
straight line. Big deal.
But using the equation
above, we arrive at the
punch line: if we
maintain the current
marriage rate (certainly
reasonable, it seems), our
entire class of 148 will be
^Pt\appily married by the
1999.992!!! Less
six years. Yep, not
usners in class, but
love.
1982 1984 1986
Remember this? For all you bachelors and bachelorettes, only 3.992 years left of singledom!!!
^^pl 1P^ ^^^^p^^ 1^>u
^^^^p ' IpHL..
^H^r^L^:hi^^F9^ s' \
k1w # p1 i
,w l— . 't iWl
ir^v
HUMOROUS €XC€gPTS FROM CLASS OF 1996 NOT£S€.TS
PflARAAAC0L06!^ By P£T£
"Disposition of Drugs"
...So, before this lecture started, I was thinking "Disposition of Drugs. ..Groovy.. .That must be where we study
which mood, or disposition, various drugs impose on you, like Valium is a mellow, happy-camper drug, and
caffeine is a jittery "I am omnipotent sort of drug." Little did I know that "Disposition of Drugs" is really a
euphemism for "Biochemistry of Drugs" (the horror, the horror...). That's right, like Communism in the 1950's
,
Biochemistry has been insidiously seeping into all aspects of our society, and this lecture is no exception. In fact,
even the hideously unpopular Henderson-Hasselbach equation will rear it's ugly head. Now that I've given you
something to really eagerly look forward to, (Pass the hemlock...), let's once again don those uncomfortable but
oh-so-swank Biochem Thinking Caps.
Otiier Stuff...
QUESn««A6Uin- THIS Sruf? 6£foRe fWBAXS TV.
Give ME f^ cA^ ^"^ «'n--sns.
AF-r£(t. 5 §i\ CALL 0R.8Pf^\0;6 KlM^Lf , ^^^
TELL l^lM 'TH'^''' '^°^^'^ WORRlfOARoUT
THIS NftTttNW-BOAROSIEST.
TOP TEN SIGNS THAT IT'S SPRING IN NEW ORLEANS
10) Lucky Dog vendors in the Quarter change hot dog water.
9) Air is filled with 9mm, "New Orleans Hummingbirds".
8) More than usual, people are mating in the streets.
7) Even pasty medical students begin to look somewhat tan.
6) Hormones mean more than just a lecture by Dr. Anderson.
5) Cab drivers yell, "It's a lovely spring day. Now get out of
the road you stupid bastard!"
4) The lovely, fragrant smells of the French Quarter.
3) Body count for the year breaks the 150 mark.
2) Board review books get bleached by the sun.
1) Everywhere you look - adorable baby cockroaches.
PHARMACOLOGY TRIVL\ THAT YOU PROBABLY WON'T BE TESTED ON:
Irish anesthesiologist Dr. John W. Dundee revealed that when dentists or anesthesiologists administer pain-killing
drugs to patients who are taking the tranquilizers Valium or Versed, the patients may experience
hallucinations that their sexual organs are being fondled by the person treating them. He also reported that some
people who use the drug clomipramine experience orgasms when they yawn. One man said that the orgasms tired
him out so much that he had to lie down for fifteen minutes after yawning.
Family members said that hearing the theme song of one of her favorite television shows, "Growing Pains",
played on a set in her hospital room, brought 27 year-old Janet Richardson out of a five day coma.
Chinese officials closed 92 noodle shops in the eastern city of Luoyang after determining that shop owners
were adding opium poppy pods or seeds to their dishes in an attempt to get customers hooked on their food. A
report in the government newspaper said that investigators became suspicious over people forming long lines at
some shops and showing little interest in others.
w^^b'V^*'^^^^^*^ '^'^iK'bifV^OrVi'^JUu^ ^K''^VM-»'^«J\/~bi ii«
p^WE YouRiELf For THE EXfSRlEWC^ Of m glOaCM BOARD T£^t!!!
REJECTED
kr MEJREP
All YOU SMOKK^' BOARDS GUNkERS
PREPARE YERSaf FER THE
o")oy^'
vg\TH THIS COKJVewithiT,D0-lT-YeRS6u^SinWLAtloM.
UKU. ItfJ
REjfEttlfes
Pharmacology
May 16, 1994.11 AM
Dr. Letora
Notes by Pete
THINGS TO DO RfmER THAN STl>PYmBIOCH£t^
© TIT TO *rbbU £Ac« <7f Ttlt, Toes ®CovMf THC HAUP> «W Y€it Fo«AnH
(j)..-6^
^ASTW
Are you an OB/G)ni?
Q: What 3 surgeries do OB/Gyns know?
A: Removing the uterus, cutting R ureter, cutting L ureter
Actually uses that phrase from PD ~ "bear down like vou re
having a BM, but you won't"
Takes cullureltcs on dates
Monitor strip for monitoring uterine contractions, FHTs, and
Dow Jones Industrial Average
Chose OB/Gyn because... doesn't like to sleep anyway
Are they stirrups? Heel rests? Leg holders?
Keeps list of upcoming lawsuits
Wheel of torture in pocket, for estimating EDL (estimated
date of litigation)
I Kcs rcllcx hammer to check for signs of pre-ecclampsia
& for knocking out screaming "tachy-lordies"
m.»|MG''^^0"» schmutz, & S.U.O. (secretions of unknown origin)
How to Perform a Forceps Delivery...& Toss a Perfect Sal;
by John King
Double FooUine Breech. Behind-the-Back. & Other Fancy
|
Deliveries by M. Biswas
Maneuvers by Leopold
Jurisprudence Malpracticus by I.M. Asnake, JD
Typical Charity patient: 18 yo G10P6036, EGA 29 wk.,
previous C/S of unknown scar, no PNC, presents to
L&D with footling breech hanging out
Are you a Pediatrician?
Knows all the names of the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers
lose Peds because... you can act like a child and get paid
MedLoans never to be paid off
Has laminated shirt for easy cleaning after vomiting
Carries Ati\an in pocket ~ for those problem parents
Enjo\s talking to patient's mother at 3 am
Chronic URI
Owns all the Disney Classics
"I love you, you love me..."
Multiple toys ~ diversionary tactics
A/P for MCU -- "Feed & Grow"
fellowship in Balloon Animal Making with the guy in
the French Quarter
Are you an Internist?
Chose Internal Medicine because really enjoys that 30 nnn ^
break between am & PM rounds failed surgery
Eyesight shot after reading Dr. Szerlip's book Electrolytes
Those LitQe Buggers '^^^^^fM/MM".
Must compulsively correct patient's calcium level
"Post-prandial Gushing' s ~ Management of
Pseudeopseudohyperparathyroidism
"7000 causes of low potassium"
Callus on thumb from reading old charts
\ctually cares how calcium channel blockers work
^
Comfortable shoes for 3 hr. round
^Iv^u
Fluent in Spanish, to converse with Tulane house officers
Extensive drug rep pen collection to write 30 pg. H&Ps
(important to collect important info like patient's travel hx)
Discussion -- problem #4 on list of 27
Washington Manual ~ 90% of IM wisdom
Pocket contents; Hemoccult developer & cards, Vacutainer
cap (earpiece replacement), calculator, tuning fork, forgotten
consult to Social Services, extra glove (Charity phlebotomy
tourniquet), extra red top tubes from yesterday.
Pad to record patient's second aunt's (twice removed) med hx
W!fM\
Are you a Surgeon?
Mental status: semi-arousable x 6 years
Hope to one day name something after himself
\
Surgical instruments: scalpel, suction, CDs ^\
P soars when clinic patient is not a sxu-gical candidate
e Surgery because... thinks to self, "what else is there?'
Favorite drink: eggnog flavor Ensure
Didn't want to e.xercise for 7 years anyway
nl's medicine book put to best use to help see over
attending's shoulder in surgery
Sunlight? What's that?
I
Vehemently denies will ever perform cholecystectomies
Wet shoulder - used as staflFs sweat sponge
Memorized Ferrara's "Razors for Blades"
(a.k.a., Cliff Notes for the Surgeon)
Loves chili-cheese-burritos from the Fistula
in scrub pocket for emergency trachs
Has his mail sent to his call room
Booties - wears them to church (to worship self)
Are you a Family Physician?
Chose FP because.. .it's a step up from undecided... loves the
great outdoors... never wanted to be rich an^-way
Bags under eyes ~ only doc in Beaver Rapids = no sleep
Map for planning best housecall circuit
Extensive fund of knowledge of nutntion
somebody has to care!
Loaner pair of crutches -- the ortho cure-all
Job security under President Hillary's Health Care Plan
National Geographic - to plan next Peace Corps Health
Mission
Contents of backpack: home-brew supplies, breakfast, lunch
dinner, potatoes (payment for Mrs. Jones latest delivery), all
handbooks from med. school including
" Made
Ridiculously Simple" series
Lack of consult forms ~ thinks she will treat everything
Wears jeans & comfortable shoes for those long hikes for
housecalls
i^^g
Are you an Orthopedist?
Chose Ortho because...athletic eligibility, exhausted
Q: How do you hide something from an orthopod
A: Write it m the chart.
rhe precise, delicate instrument of his trade (can even
calibrate it himself)
Has memonzed e.\lensi\ e differential
1
bone broke
2. bone not broke
3. bone ma\ be broki
Medicine consults — one per patient problem
Athletic supporter under scrubs
//
Heart -- the muscle that pumps Ancef to the bone
Still plays on undergrad intramural teams (defeated School of
Social Work in flag football to capture 3rd place -
out of 4 teams)
Stethoscope sued only on the "pod point" ~ where RRR ?
M/G/R, B CTA, and +BS can be simultaneously detected
Are you a Radiologist?
Chose Radiology because... needs extra time to work on goJf
handicap
Last film orda\ -- time for lunch!
-V-vxN,\^
Dictaphone -has lost abilit\- to w nlc
-^^^ Glasses reduce glare from viewbox
C*- "Nonspecific finding --
I clinical correlation recommended Wow ! Look at those breast shadows!
Radiation tag in pocket monitoring exposure ofMtal oigans^'^'N
ght doubles as sunlamp to' tan between films
ms'^A
Are you an Emergency Physician?
Chose Emergencv' Medicine Ixv^m^c no ^nW. no call, no cal
I ^1
Accuraielv determines blood alcohol IcncI with a single whiff
f I
Sid. orders: CBC. SMA20. PT/PTT. L'A, UPT. LP. CXR.
KUB. CT. BAL. Uto.x. EKG, DPL. VDRL. ABG. NG. AFT
NPA...STAT! ---r-i.i^
Enjoys the challenge of relating to patient
Has o\\n private rcscr\e of Hcmocculldcvclopcr & cards
A Dr. Mark Greene wannabe -- closet addict of Must See TV
)ccidcd to take .ACLS one step further..
^UPT'.' Call OB
Likes cookbook medicine
Lo\es the excitement, not the follow-up
E\tcnsi\e wardrobe: scrubs & jeans
Are you a Psychiatrist?
Chose Psychiatry because... saw surgeons for what thcv are
Affect appropriately flattened -- uses Steven Wnght
as role model
Medicine consult for temp of 1'
Practicing drawing "Luck> to win art scholarship
^'
Realizes the importance of the subUe differences between the
DSM-IIIR and the DSM-IV
En|oys weekends off - for life!
Checks watch for that 50 min. hour ~ another
$150...ChaChing!
Rx pad m pocket -- "the difference between me and a
psychologist"
Glass of wine between appointments — to take the edge off
the day |
^B-zmk
Are you undecided?
1 could do orthopedics... no, a mind is a terrible thing to waste j could do pediatrics...! like kids, just not (he parents
1 could do neurosurgcn ..but 1 don't ha\c a God complex
I could do internal medicine... will, the subspecialties are OK_
but rd ha\e to do IM first. .AND learn Spanish
I could do ophihomolog> . opUiamology. ophthalmog>...but 1
misspelled it on my applications
ould do ENT...but I dont kno\\ how to use that Marcus
Welby over-the-eye mirror thing-a-ma-jig
could do neurolog>...but that "anal wink" thing really
bothers me
I could do radiology... but I'd go craz>^ sitting in a dark room
by myself all day |||HH|a^^^nH|
I could do dermatolog\...but they don't let their residents tan
could do psychiatry... no, I have enough problems of my own
1 could do PM&R...what do they do anyway?
I could do OB/Gyn. ..Gross! ! Too many bodv fluids!
^£^^L ^ C^ ' I could do cmergena medicine... but 1 look bad in scrubs
I could do paiholog) ai least I couldn't kill anybody ] could do anesthesia., but I'd have to work with surgeons
I could do famils practice. 1 could do surgery, bill I'd have lo work with surgeons 1 don't want to move lo the
boonics
Match Day 1996
w^-^lUi
...And the Envelope Please
And WeThought We'd Never Make It!
INTERNSHIP AND RESIDENCY APPOINTMEN IS
CLASS of 1996
Adain,Cairick Pediatrics UCSD Medical Center
Aden,BraiiDon OphOiahnology Tulme Umversity
Aliniazee, Mateen Ophthalmology TvUme Universi^
AHaii, Sean Psychiatry NYU Medical Cenler
Allen, Alex Psychiatry Tripler Army Med, HI
Apolinario, Arthur Fam MeJ St Vincent HlUi Ctr PA
Archer, William Pediatrics Madigan Army Med, WA
Bsiker.Layne FamMed Alton Ochsner Foundation
Behar. Jeffrey Diagnostic Radiology Duke University
Bender, Thomas Surgery KeeslerAFB.MS
Benjamin, Scott PM&R Sinai Hospital. MD
Bober, Michael Pediatrics Tulane University
Bocchicchio.Mari: InternalMedicine Mercy Hasp, CA
Boone, Bradley Surgery VJTSW- Dallas
Bonch, Charles Surgery UTSW- Dallas
BTOVwi,Neil EmergencyMed VtdvolWnoiaClacaio
BiyanWeaky Urology Tulane Universi^
Burnett, James Orthopaedics TX A&M Scott & White
5yOT. Maiy PreUm Medicine McGaw Med Ctr/NWU IL
Canby,NeiI Transitional San Diego Naval Hospital
Cswthon, Thomas EmergencyMed LSU-NO
Chambeis. Alan Surgery Travis AFB, CA
Chang, Eli Ophthalmology Cornell University, NY
Charles, Aaron EmergencyMed Cook County Hosp, IL
Chastain, Made Prelim Medicine Ttdane University
Chen, Peggy PM&R. Baylor College Houston
Cheung, Sheii Med-Peds Baystate Med Ctr MA
Chun, CSrace InternalMedicine Harbor-UCLA
Clark, Peter FamMed St Mary's FamPrac Res, CO
Claik, Russell EmergencyMed WSU/DelroitMedCtr
ClaricThcmas Pediatrics Emory University, GA
Cnota, Melissa Surgery U Tenn COM-GME, Memphis
Cook, Judson Neurosurgery Univ ofMD
Cockier, Joseph OB/GW New Hanover Med Ctr, NC
Courtright, Mally Prelim Medicine UnivAii2ona AffilHoap
CuBchiata, Brett Prelim Medicine Tulane University
Debnam,Mfltt Diagnostic Radiology Tulane University
Delgado, Myitk Pediatrics Tulane Umversity
Delgado, Neator OB/GW Tulane Univeisily
Dent, Ed Fam Med Ft Collins Fam Med CO
Dupuy, Gary Pediatrics Tiipler Amiy Med, HI
Eikenbeny, Mark Med-Peds UMinnesota Hosp & Chnics
Enera, Timothy Pediatrics Haibor-UCLA
Evans, Jennifer OB/GM Udiv Louisville SOM, KY
Eveted,jQhn Pediatrics UCSF
Fanica-, Mark Pediatrics UT-Housttm
Fieselman, Melanie PM&R UAB
FiKsher, Frank Ophthalmology Tulane Ifeiveisily
Fitqjaliidc Philip Otolaryngology Tulane University
Foroozesh, Mahtab Prelim Medicine Tnlaue IJoivarsity
Frain, Bryan Aiterao/A/erftoVieMedUnivof SC
Futemidc Marc EmergencyMed UCSF-Fresno
Garrett, Nancy Pediatrics Tiipler Army Med, HI
Oeddis, Pamela PMiiR Baylor CoMege-Houslon
Girora, Timicia Anesthesiology UT-Honston
Gtopczynski, Deborah Fam Med Memorial Hosp RI
GrifBn, Page Fam Med Nalividad Med Ctr CA
Griggs, Eric Anesthesiology Tulane Univettsity
Hart. Suzarme Pediatrics Tulane University
Hennan, Allison Med-Peds UT-Houston
Hitchins, Lisa Prelim Medicine Tulane Uiriversity
Hoffrnan, Rex Radiation Oncology UCSF
Huang, Enoch EmergencyMed UC~Irvine
Huhn, Gregory Prelim Medicine Duke University
Jefl&ies. Howard Pediatrics Children's Memorial IL
Jones, Jason Psychiatry Cambridge Hosp MA
Jordan, Cami Pediatrics UVA-Charlottesville
Jordan, Louis Orthopaedics UVA-Charlottesville
Klein. Eric Urology West Virginia University
Knower, Maik InternalMedicine Alton Oohsner LA
Kramer, Robyn FamMed Spartanburg RegMed SC
Lam, Van Med-Peds Tulonc Un.vcrsily
Lauer, Donald Eimrgency MedicUK Li H.-.taok.-ionv,U<;
Lee, Charles Prelim Medicine Alton Oohsner LA
Liebkemann, Waller Diagnostic Radiology Bowman Gray/NC BapUsr
Lovell, Dime Radiology Travis AFB
Lovitt, ShoUy OB/GYN Alton Ochsner
Lowentritt, Joshua Neurology Tulane
Lynch, Megan Surgery Emory University
Maodonald, Richard EmergencyMedicine Johns Hopkms
Mann, Sheri Pathology Baylor College
Martin, Patrick FontMed Sutter Hllh Faro Prac. CA
Mathes. David Surgery New York Hospital
Medora, Christine Primary Medicine Cambridge Hosp. MA
Melancon, Keith Surgery Tulane University
Miller, Jef&ey Fam Med Ventura County Med Ctr. CA
Mizuguchi.Nana Surgery Univ Louisville, KY
Mora, Robert EmergencyMed LSU-NO
Muii*y-Lavoie, Heather EmergencyMed LSU-NO
Nafcamuia, Shelley Prelim Surgery Tulane
Netland, Karin EmergencyMed LSU-NO
Nguyen, Dominic InternalMedicine St Paul Med Ctr, TX
Oehler, Chnstine OB/GYN Maricopa Med Ctr, A2
Palumbo.Carl Orthopaedics UC-Davis Med Ctr - SACTO
Pauley, Elizabeth Surgety E TN State U - Johnson City
Perry. Tina InternalMedicine UCSD Med Clr
Pumell, William PM&R Eisenhower Army Med, OA
Rasque.Hope Surgery Si Mary's Hospital, CT
Raziano, Joseph Emergency Medicine Emory
Richards, Troy Rad-Dx Umv Fl - Shands Hospital
Robinson, Slocoy Pa?n Med Travis AFB
Ross, Janet OB/GYN Tulane
Ross, Steven Psychiatry Tulane
Ryan, Steven Internal Medicine Oregon Health Sciences Univ
Samadi.Faizin Internal Medicine W LAVA Med -CA
Sandoval, Frances Anesthesiology Tulane
Sands, Kenneth fYelim Surgery Tulane
Santiago, Jose Internal Medicine Alton Oohsner
Schockel, Luanne OB/GYN Sinai Samaritan Univ - 'iVl
Sohoenstadt, Arthur Transitional San Diego Naval Hosp
Shapiro, Linda InternalMedicine Univ Massachusetts
Shields, Patrick Internal Medicine Univ Arizona Affil Hosp
Smith, Eric Transitional Tripler Army Med
Sonbaadith, Viiabandith FamMed U FL-Jacksonville
Sorosky, Gwen Psychiatry Stanford Health Serv - CA
Stanski, Cheryl Surgery Tulane University
Strohecker, Loirie PrimaryMedicine Highlands Hosp -CA
Sutherland, Vaana Psychiatry UCSF
Talton, Stephanie Prelim Surgery Tulane University
Tirone.Crystin Megan OB/GYN UT-Houstcai
Tirone, Thomas Surgery Baylor College-Houston
Tran,Phuoc Psychiatry UCSF-Fresno
Tran, Huy Quoc Diagnostic Radiology Barnes-Jewish Hasp- MO
Tucker, David Psychiatry TX A&M - Scott & White
Turner, Keat Anesthesiology Brigham & Women's - MA
Tveit, Daniel Internal Medicine San Diego Naval Hosp
Vahedifar, Payam PM&R W LA VA Med - CA
Ventirra, Veronica OB/GYN Madigan Army Med, WA
Waguespack, Paul Neurosurgery Tulane University
Waldron, John Fam Med Kaiser Permanente - CA
WengrolT, .Scan Transitional Tulane University
Westarvelt. Christopher Fam Med Alton Ochsner
V/hitworth, Anthony Neurosurgery UT-Meraphis
Williams, Rodrek Frelhn Surgery Tulane University
Wilson, Leslie Transitional St John's Mercy Hosp - MO
WUson. Michael Med-Peds U MN Hosp & Clinics
Woil, Michael Surgery Walter Reed Army Med - DC
Wong, Eric Med-Puds U Hawaii Integ Med Res
Woodward, Ann Surgery Tulane University
Wutlke, Jason Psychiatry Harvard Longwood PSYC - MA
Young, Kisa Transitioned Tulane University
Zerwas, Michelle Pediatrics Tulane University
wsrm^
^f3 ^^^^^^K^B:f 1^ ^^Mjv' r^ <r>1(j
^^^^H J
•k^•- 4
'_^ _ /^ v^..
. £.jm^l
• *
i
,j>ts^mm^
if^^M
"''ll
V^ 1^
i
AW.^^'/A
The 1996 T-Wave Committee
Against insurmountable odds, undaunted b
adversity, this hardy crew slaved for many ;
moon to bring you this record of our sojoun
at Tulane. There are not words to adequate"
sum up their efforts, there are not words to
adequately thank them. The editors would
like to show a token of their appreciation by
paying off their loans, but - alas - after the
trouble the previous year's book caused, the
dean wouldn't let us have the dough. Pleas
let them know how much you appreciate
their work.
The 1996 T-Wave Editors
.eslie B. Wilson, co-editor Robyn T. Kramer, editor-in-chief
You must do the thing you think you cannot do. —Eleanor Roosevelt
We hope this book serves as a summary, providing closure and reminders, of the four most challenging years
our education to date. Producing it was a lot like giving birth, but hopefully the results will be treasured just as
uch. We are grateful for the assistance given by Douglas Patton, Floyd Cheung, Neil Brown, Missy and Bill from
'Stens, and everyone at Academic Publishing, Inc. We especially would like to acknowledge the committee mem-
?rs who gave 110%, going beyond the call: Stacey, Lorrie, Mattie, and Sheri.
Arthur E. Apolinario
CONGRATULATIONS!!
We are all very proud of you!!
Dad, Ma, Kurt, Arlyn, Lindsy,
Bryan, Mike, Cannel, ?, Rob,
Deanna, Ethel.
Jeff Behar
You traveled around the world
to find your future and now
you've found it. We're very
proud of you and wish you
much success and happiness.
(And we hope this is it!)
--Lenore & Victor Behar
Thomas W. Bender, III
Congratulations! Your hard
work and determination is
finally paying off. You will
soon be able to fulfill your
longtime dream of helping
others as a physician. We are
very proud of you.
Love, MOM, DAD, &
ANDREW
Michael Bober
You have achieved your dream.
Like Frost you have chosen the
road less traveled. That made
the difference 1 am proud.
—Marvin Bober
Mike, my son, my friend, you
took the road less traveled. At
long last your journey begins.
May you do great and
wonderful things. Wishing you
the best along the way.
--Proud Mom
Roll the bones!!!
-Robert Bober
250
Wesley W. Bryan
Wesley: We are proud of your
accomplishments. Know you
will be an excellent physician.
We love you and we pray God's
blessings upon you.
Love, Mama & Daddy
Aaron J. Charles
Our pride and joy are
boundless. Congratulations
Aaron and Debra!
Love, Mom and Dad
James Matthew Debnam
Congratulations on your
achievement! May you have
fair skies and smooth sailing.
Bon Voyage!
—Mom and Dad
Nestor & Myrtle Delgado
Nestor & Myrtle: Veni, vidi,
vici! We are proud of you!
Congratulations!
Papi, Mami, & Family
Gary Paul Dupuy
Best Wishes -the Dupuy
Family
Great job! With love.
Mom & Ron
Congratulations Gary, and best
wishes from your brother Frank,
also Kim, and Cameron.
Keep up the good work!
-Donald
Mark Eikenberry
Mark, your accomplishments
are only exceeded by your zest
for life, and that's the way it
should be. Keep up the good
work! Love, Mom and Dad
wumB
Congratulations, Mark!
I envy your drive and intellect.
Love, Jen
Jennifer Evans
Congratulations! Now we
know why you made us
exchange that nurse's bag for
the doctor's bag when you were
six. Good luck!
Love, Mom & Dad.
Frank J. Fischer, III
Congratulations Class of 1996!
Good luck and Godspeed.
And to "son Frank" --
you have earned your own place
in a proud legacy:
our third Frank J. Fischer, MD
Frank, our brother, a doctor??
We are so-o very proud of you!!
Keep 'em alive,
Kaki and Mardy
Congratulations Frank Fischer,
Godson and fellow Tulane grad.
T. Howell, MD
Burr Ilgenfritz, MD
Marc Futernick
To Marc Futernick
With our admiration,
respect, and love!
Mom & Dad, Christy,
Cathie & Hubie,
Frank & Karen, Lee & Nicole,
Jeff & Joanie
Page Bynum (jriffin
Congratulations, Page
Your family is proud of you
Love, Mom, Dad,
(icrald, Alice, fae
Suzanne Hart Jarlsjo
TUTTI,
Roses are red, Violets are blue.
The job was tough, and we are
proud of you!
-Mom & Dad
Jason Jones
To Jason with all our love.
We wish for you a future
bright with promise and
excitement.
Please know how proud we are
of the man and doctor you have
become.
—Mom and Dad
Eric William Klein
We are very proud of your
accomplishments. Good luck
with your future in medicine.
-Mom and Dad
Mark Knower
Paging Dr. Knower!
Someone proud, happy, & in
love has a congrats hug for you!
Love, Mrs. Dr. Knower
We salute you. Dr. Mark
Knower, for this tremendous
achievement!
Grandma & Grandpa Sciara
Congrats, Dr. Mark Knower:
"Our #1 inspiration"
Love, your sisters Amy &
Bridgette
Congratulations, Dr. Mark
Knower, from Mr. & Mrs.
'I'homas "My son is a doctor"
Knower
2S1
Robyn Theresa Kramer
The Robyn that came in spring;
tra, la
Was such a glorious thing.
Now she is a doctor; tra, la.
And that's a wonderful thing.
Love and Best Wishes
~ Mom and Dad
Congratulations, Robyn
Kramer, on finishing three
things at once: the T-Wave, the
state of "singleness," and Med
School. Love, Judy & Robert,
Atlanta
Congratulations, Robyn, on
your success in medicine! May
God continue to bless
you with a fine practice.
-Berthold R. Kramer
Way to go Ro!
Love, Bro
Diane M. Lovell
Congratulations Dr. Lovell,
Your dream has come true!
We wish you happiness and
success! Love and hugs.
Mom and Dad
D. Patrick Martin
Congratulations Patrick,
Your family & friends are so
proud of you! As a young
doctor we know you are on the
threshold of great
accomplishments &
service to all mankind.
Love, Dad & Mom
Christine R. Medora
We're so proud of you. Dr.
Chris! We love you lots!
-Dad, Mom, Lisa, Mair, Henry,
Neil, and David.
252
Robert Alexander Mora
Robert. I remember you as a
child always wanting to be a
doctor. Now your efforts are
becoming a reality.
Congratulations, God bless you.
--Mom
Shelley Kimie Nakamura
Our loving congratulations for
your achievement! We are so
proud of you!
Love, Mom & Dad
William Leslie Purnell
Congratulations Will Purnell
—Mom
To Will Purnell, you did it!
—Karen
Congrats & Best Wishes WP!
-MM
Stacev Robinson
Parents, family, and friends of
Dr. Stacey Robinson
congratulate a remarkable
woman on her extraordinary
achievements.
Grandpa would be most proud.
Kenneth Sands
Your hard work and
determination has paid off We
are very proud of you.
Congratulations to our new
"Dr. Sands."
Love, Mom & Dad
Luanne Schocket
Congratulations and love
from your family.
Arthur L. Schoenstadt
Congrats Art with love
—Mom & Dad
Uncle Art ~ send money!
-John & Michele Wetherbie
v^^H
Glenn Patrick Shields
Congratulations and best
wishes. We love you and are
very proud of you.
John, Nancy, Jon & Tina
Stephanie Yvonne Talton
To Stephanie, Congratulations
and much success! From
Parents Mickey and Sue Talton,
and Sisters Sonya and Niaja.
Jena Stephanie VandenBer2
May all your days be Saturdays,
Sundays, and holidays.
We are proud of you,
Mom, Bruce, and
Chester the Pony
John Darrell Waldron
God bless you, my son,
the doctor!
—Your proud Mom
Hope you can write with
both hands!
—Your step-pharmacist, Ted
This is my son whom I love,
with him I am well pleased
—Your Dad
Sean Daryl WengrofT
We are so proud of you,
for your accomplishments.
Love, Mom & Dad
Leslie Wilson
Dear Leslie, You're the
Bestest!! Love, the "Rents"
Dear Leslie, To my favorite
Big Sis! Love, Bro - BD6G
Dear l>eslie. Thanks for the best
home & clan! Love, Toonces
I'm so proud! Love, Your
favorite Jewish grandmother
This year med. school ...
next year MENSA!
Love, Uncle Jeff
Jason Wuttke
Congratulations
Tulane Medical School
Class of 1996
—Carmela and Juergen Wuttke
Kirstin Elizabeth Young
May you always have deft hands
and a warm stethoscope (or vice
versa?).
Three hurrahs and well done.
Mom, Dad, and your bro 'Jason
Michelle Zerwas
From the beautifiil little girl who
got ear infections, to the doctor
who will heal them: what a
wonderful transformation! You
are our pride and joy: smart,
beautiful, and caring. You will
make a great physician.
Congratulations on your MD. —
Mary Alexander & Skip
Faulkner
Grandparents are proud of you!
Hope Rasque
My daughter the doctor
My heart is bursting with pride
Honey, I am proud to be your
mother. 1 love you, Mommie
253
^0 Tiie iiua
m
liilaiie lUiiYcrsi uy IVJi C'dicai DCiiO'i
Congratulations & Many Years of Success & Prosperity
-cvQ(^)v)-
ul.uu' Uiii\xrMi\' ri(\snii,)l &' C.liiiic Cdii^r.uulaU'.s ihr it)g5 lulaiic
Uiinnsiu iVIcJicil School '-^r.ulu.uc.s ,iiul wislics llnni hani'iiius.s ,iikI
Micci'.s.s. 1 hr l,iciill\, M.ill niul .iJniiiiiM i ,ii loii ,\w nroiiJ ol \'oiii' .scliol.iMic .hkI
pi'olrsMoii.il ,u 1. oiiinliNliiiunts ol ilic n.isi mmimI wmi.s. ^oii .iir ,i \,ilii,ilMi' nail o(
our 1 1 .uluioii ol ni o\ iJiiKj^ nai iriil.s w nil llu' IxM lu'.illlicai r ,n ailaliK'.
\\v hopi I ha I 111 la lie I 'iiivi isil\ lloNiiiial c\' ( .liiiic will com iiiiu' lo hi' a nan ol \'oiir
liMinmo ami nroli ssional hie ihroiK^houl \oiir caret i'. ^oii a\\- owv lilchlood, owv
honi aiul our luiiiic.
Aoam, coiuj^raiiilaiioiis on \\^\\v achic\rmcm aiul \\i' wish \\n\ (•\ii\' .succcs.s ami
[M'ospciiU' ior I he I 111 urc. I '.ach aiul c\ cr\' one ol \oii Jesirxcs onl\' (he hesl.
-'^<WS^
Tulane
U N I V B R S I T Y
IIOSIMTAI. & CLINIC
'; I
I
THE LEADER IN
SPINAL SYSTEMS
INTRODUCES...
Implant Modularization Packaging
SOFAMOR
- DANEK
THE SPINE SPECIALIST
SiiFAMCRlUSRK L'W IWOI'iMriiid Mate Memphis. IS 1SH2
« '•>bi\ii fAX;(9nH3.<: fj:o W.M.S: (8(10) 87(1 'i
Warning: Ihis tlrt kr u iHit upprovcd for screw Jttachnicni or fuuliun lo the
p''" '
' ' I'ttKoTMCjI.ihoracicorlumli.if spine.
Caiiliiin: '• yimip>irkiii .ii'eKh»)»lem.l!iili\s
' ^omponrnuiil JiilL-Ti-nt iiv.YU*iTUkhi'iilJ
":,' "ir. < : i.iniiiin" itnMi.(ti'>n\, •* I'W,''> Wamor Panel
I'nmatcluxi \ersatilit\' of proven
components in a streamlined modular
packaging program offering multiple
options, intra- operati^'e solutions and
cost eftectJN'eness.
TSRH \ ariablc Anizle Screws and
GDLH Rod/Bolt CAinnectors may
he combined to achieve tlexihility
and versatilitv in all planes with
minimal rodcontourinii.
The DYNA-l.OK Spinal System
has been successfulh' tested usintr
A.SIM pnn isional standards loo\er
2 million cvcles, demonstratin''
strength and coiMrucl slabilit\.
^ Threade(.l(.l)l,ll Variable Dislance
I looks allow translation wiihoul
sublaminarwires. (il)l I i lapered shoe
blades minimize canal space intrusion.
From their five-arm multilink rear suspension, to their CFC-free air conditioning system, the Mercedes C220 and
C280 are buOt to the same standards as each of our sixteen other Mercedes-Benz models. LAJ Mercedes-Benz
The C-Class. Starting at $31,545:
The G-Class. Engineered like sixteen other cars in the world
See all the well-engineered cars at your Mercedes-Benz dealer.
Audubon Imports
11455 Airline Highway Baton Rouge, LA (504) 296-7290
*MSRP fora C220 includes $595 transportation charge. Excludes all taxes, title/documentary fees, registration, tags, dealer prep charges,
insurance, optional equipment, certificate of compliance or noncompliance fees, and finance charges. Prices may vary by dealer
©1995 Authorized Mercedes-Benz Dealers
WSLMi
Providing
legal services
to physicians and
health careproviders
throughout the
GulfSouth.
Adams and Reese
REGISTERED LIMITED UABILITY PARTNERSHIP
Mlomeys and Counselors at Law
New Orleans
Baton Rouge Mobile
Houston Washington, D.C.
GENERATION AFTER GENERATION,
The King's Daughters Hospital
has provided excellence
in health care.
Treatment Room • Critical Care • X-Ray • EcJiocardlography
CAT Scan • Mammography Lab • Same Day Surgery
Physical Therapy • Laboratoiy Sei"vlces • LlUrasound
Occupational HealUi Services • Skilled Nursing Facility Uuil
Respiratory Tlierajjy • Pedlalrics • Obslclrlcs/Gynccology
Child Life Program • Guest Relations Program • Patient Education
Medical Surgical Unit • EEG/EKG • Endoscopic
Laser Surgery • Sleep Disorders Lab
TliE King's Daughters
HOSPITAL
Greenville, Mississippi
(601] 378-2020
c
BROOK, MORIAL, PIZZA AND
VAN LOON, L.L.P.
Attorneys And Counselors At Law
Suite 2500
400 Poydras Street
New Orleans, Louisiana 701 30
Telephone (504) 566-0600
Fax (504) 595-8715
With Offices Located In
Baton Rouge andSlidell, Louisiana
Contact:
Normand F. Pizza
Avoyelles Hospital
Marksuille, Louisiana
Oakdale Community Hospital
Oakdale, Louisiana
Rapides Regional Medical Center
Alexandria, Louisiana
Savoy Medical Center
Matnou, Louisiana
Winn Parish Medical Center
Winnfii'ld, Louisiana
members of ,
Columbia Regional
Healtli System
A Nc'wf oii\inilii\nil Id I Ic.illlu.iiv Tii)',rlUT
STANOCOLA MEDICAL CLINIC
MULTI-SPECIALTY CLINIC
"Serving The Medical Needs OfBaton Rouge
For Over 70 Years"
1401 Noiili Foslcr
Hiiion Roii-o, LA 70800
(504) 928-6730
Congratulations To The Class Of 1996
LAFAYETTE WOOD-WORKS, INC.
Established since 1946
524 Elmwood Park Boulevard SUITE 190
Jefferson, LA. 70123
(504) 733-3555
COME VISIT OUR SHOWROOMS AND
SEE OUR WIDE SELECTION OF DOORS,
WINDOWS, MANTELS, MOULDINGS, OUR
BEAUTIFUL SANDCARVED C.LASS ARL,
AND MUCH MORE!
"WE BELIEVE IN QUALII V FIRS I" CASTOR Lafayette, New Orleans, Baton Ron^e, n- c.j™ WooJ-Wori„r
and Lake Charles
THERATECH
A Developer and Manufacturer of
Innovative Controlled Release
Drug Delivery Products
Congratulates
The Tulanc University
School of Medicine '.v
Class of 1996
4 1 7 Wakara Way, Sail Lake Cily, Ulaii X4 1 08
L
Other
companies are
rushing to add
"Customer Service."
We built a
company focused
on serving
our customers.
Astra Merck
Astra Merck provides excellence
in pharmaceutical solutions for
gastrointestinal and
cardiovascular disease.
For more information, please contact our
regional headquarters:
3H38 Nortli Causeway Blvd.
Laktway ill, Suite 2Am
Metaine, LA 70002
5(H-.S31-1HH0 • 80()-'l72-7241
PRiLOSeC^
(OMEPRAZOLE)
Plendil
(lelfldipiiicl
©Astra Merck 153156 9/9!
Keach for Radiofone and get the best in
cellular and paging. We keep you in touch
everywhere you want to go. Radiofone.
The single source you've trusted for over
35 years. Radiofone
CELLULAH & PAGING
We're RightMeWith you
Cellular 837-9540 Paging 837-2337
^ #n
The Base
of Our
1^ Strength
is Our
People.
At East Pasco Medical Center, more than 1,000 people form the base of our
health care structure. From the volunteers, mamtenance team, housekeepers,
food service staff, office workers, secretaries, insurance specialists, coordina-tors
and admmistrators that keep the hospital functionmg, to the social work-ers,
therapists, technicians, physicians, nurses and assistants that provide
your care. Their hard work and dedication is the very foundation that our
hospital is built on, and with the support of each and every one of them, we
can continue to provide the most up-to-date health care services available for
our community, east Pasco County residents and visitors.
Eastr^
Pascok^
Medical
Center
7050 Gall Boulevard
Zephyrhills, Flonda 33541
(813)788-0411
ADVENTIST HEALTH SYSTEM SUNBELT HEALTHCARE CORPORATION
n opportunity in southeast Louisiana ... at ^GMC
Located in the heart of southeast Louisiana, Terrebonne General
Medical Center, a 261 -bed facility, serves as a regional referral
center, providing comprehensive medical services to the citizens
of Terrebonne parish and surrounding communities.
Terrebonne General Medical Center has the distinction of being
recognized as a center of excellence in such fields as Cardiology,
Oncology, and Orthopedics, with over 150 medical staff in 30
medical specialties. We have received national acclaim in such
publications as The Wall Street Journal and Modern Healthcare.
Among our many achievements is the U.S. Senate Award for
Innovation, awarded for the successful development and
ir.nprovement of new technologies. Most recently, TGMC was
: '.arded Accreditation with Commendation by the Joint
Commission on Accreditation f)f Healthcare Organizations
(JCAHO;,
To discover opportunities waiting for you in Houma, Louisiana at Terrebonne
General Medical Center by call the Medical Staff Liaison at (504) 873-4085.
Terrebonne General Medical Center 936 Kast Main .Strttt, Floiima, I-A 70360.
^^|ii^^'
^iiaeUe
TGMC 7'rrre6onnt: (frnerat ^edicaf Center
Seeing the Challenge.
Making the Commitment.
Congratulations
to all 1 996 Graduates.
Maxum wishes you the best of
luck in your future careers.
maxum
MAXUM HEALTH CORR
14850 Quorum Dr., Suite 400
Dallas, Texas 75240
Symbols Of
Quality
Each step you've
taken to improve
your mind lias been a
long-term investment in
your future. And ours as well.
Premier Bank congratulates you for your
tireless dedication. And for your uncompro-mising
commitment to achievement.
That's what we call
Everyday Excellence. A lid^^lilf^lBailk
better
way.
MEMBER FD:C
(onptukiom and M Wife
^ ^ >
David W. Wall 1, M
5228 Dijon Drive • Baton Rouge, LA 70808
(604) 767-3900
3600 Fiorida Blvd. • Baton Rouge, lA 70806
(604)381-6544
2647 Rivervlew Blvd. • Gonzales, LA 70737
(504) 647-4565
-f
59315 River West Drive, Ste. C • Plaquemine, LA 70864
(604)687-6669
^
i
For a job well done!
Cdnbratulatidns td the
TuLANE University
Medical Center
Graduating Class df 1 996.
TfflONVILLE LABORATORIES, INC.
ANALYTICAL CHEMISTS AND INSPECTORS
P.D. BOX Z36B7 * 544D PEPSI STREET
New Orleans, La 7D1B3-D6B7
c
Ni^c
Napoleon Kidney Center Inc. )
2817 NAPOLEON AVENUE • NEW ORLEANS, LA. 70115 • TEL. (504) 891-8176
congratulates the
1996 GRADUATES OF THE
TULANE UNIVERSITY MEDICAL CENTER
Napoleon Kidney Center, a free-standing dialysis facility, provides a
wide variety of treatment modalities and a full support staff to meet
the medical, nutritional and social needs of its patients.
IXeStf^Ul
Medical Services
M
Before Starting Your Practice,
Consult A Specialist
As you begin your practice, look to St. Paul Medical Services
for your medical liability in.surance. As a resident, you qualify
for a discount on your premium.
With more than 60 years of specialized experience, we are the
nation's leading medical liability insurer.
St, Paul Medical Services. Specialists in medical liability insurance,
For more inlbrnialion, please contact Nancy Sarno at
800.328.2189, cxt. 2677.
St. Paul Fire and Marine Insurance Company
Si. Paul Medical Services
385 Washinijion Sireel
'^i P;iiil, Mirinii:;fii;if)r)in213nfi
Lake Charles Diesel, Inc.
Detroit Diesel Dealers
45 Years Of Service
Lake Charles
5400 Hwy 90 East
318/433-6311
436-7377
Cameron
60 From St.
318/775-5513
FLANAGAN INSTRUMENTS, INC.
Manaocnicnt and staff
congratulate the graduates of
Tulanc University Medical Center.
Since 1981 we have been proud to
be your Carl Zeiss Dealer. Thanks
to Tulane Universit)' Medical Center
for its support.
ZEIXX ]. I Ingg rlanagan
Prcsidcnl, Owner
Presently the largest Pilot Association in the southern
United States, and one of the largest pilot groups in the
world, the Crescent River Port Pilots Association
collectively pilot soine of the largest ships in the world
and also serve in the dual capacity of docking inasters.
The Crescent River Port Pilots Association is a responsible
organization of 93 highly skilled professional ship pilots,
dedicated to the welfare of the inaritime industry, the Port
of New Orleans, and the State of Louisiana and all its
citizens. The Crescent Pilots not only provide a safe
pilotage system for the world's shippers, but also to help
proinote and stimulate economic growth in the state
and the nation.
For fuither information
call (504) 392-8001
anytime . .
they never close! ^
Serving the interests of
the maritime industry
since 1908.
Congratulations
on behalf of
elan liharmaceutical research corporation
1300 Gould Drive, Gainesville, Georgia 30504, USA
Telephone; (404) 534-8239- Fax: (404) 534-8247
rauil
Congratulations
McDermott International, Inc.
1450 Poydras Street
New Orleans, Louisiana 70112
Cardiovascular Institute of the South
Cardiology ^ Surgery
Prevention
<:b
Complete Cardiovascular Care
24 hour telephone service
876-0300
or loll free 1-800-445-9676
300 Liberty Street
Houma, Louisiana
HEALTHPOINT®
Healthpoint Medical,
an innovator of unique
pharmaceutical and
over-the-counter
wound care products,
congratulates the class
of 1996 for their
outstanding
accomplishments.
HEMAELTDKIPCOIABLiT'
2400 Handley-Ederville Road
Fort Worth, TX 76118
800-441-8227
Chaffe^MfCall
Willips^er
SINCE 1826
MANAGED HEALTH CARE
TAX LAW
HOSPITAL LIABILITY LITIGATION
ANTITRUST LAW
HEALTH CARE CONTRACTING
GENERAL LITIGATION
LABOR AND EMPLOYMENT LAW
MEDICAL MALPRACTICE LAW
NEW ORLEANS
(504) 5B5-7000
MIAMI
(305) 377-2726
BATON ROUGE
(S04) 922-4300
CARACAS
(Ot 1) 582-953-4136
AAOR£ NOT£SfeT £XC£gPTS
3^A1 s,xj ,s|£2L " Tfl€ WALT OF ICAA" BROWN
"The H&P"
... Announcements: Dr. Szerlip is quite interested in our assessment of Biostats and Epi. Go to his office and
bend his ear. Rumor has it that he Ukes to discuss his plan for a "Bring Back Bush" lecture series; ask him about
it.
... Today's lecture is a virtual carbon copy of the handout and as such I am only going to include the material
which was not contained in the handout. This will save paper, which will save trees, which will stop
deforestation and erosion, and in effect halt the greenhouse effect and save mankind. I feel good!
... Also, Dr. Szerlip reiterated that the job of obtaining a comprehensive history is that of the doctor, and excuses
that the patient is difficult or a poor historian are weaker than a warm glass of Sharp's. Weak.
...As for the reliability of the liistory, it is important to know who gave the information. Was he comatose and a
relative provided information? Does the patient have Fudgesicle intelligence...
...Dr. Szerlip likes to tell a story in transcribing the HPI. He gives an example in the handout, and although John
Grisham probably needn't worry, it does contain all the relevant data.
... At this point Dr. Szerlip told a Reagan joke. Retaliation is in the works.
... Habits: Ask everyone, regardless of how silly it seems. Grandma may do bong rips for breakfast.
"All You Ever Wanted to Know About ENT - But Were Afraid You Wouldn't Understand"
... Announcements: Next weeks ENT breakout groups are postponed until further notice (shucks). Also, Dr.
Szerlip reiterated that these lectures are not truly reproducible by noteset, and he won't curve his tests, so it would
behoove slackers to come to class. Otherwise you might honor Path and Micro but fail ICM and, ham sandwich
in hand, become a two-time T2.
... Want to prove that you're a gunner's gunner but don't know how? If so, ENT is the surgical subspecialty for
you... Dr. Amedee mentioned for all of you non-Waltian mere mortals out there that you don't have to be AOA
"but it helps" (It's also not necessary to have won the Nobel Prize for a drug which turns peanut butter into
functioning cranial tissue, "but it helps").
... Today Dr. Amedee did a complete head and neck exam with an otoscope, and then followed this with an exam
using telescopes which broadcast live over our multimedia system (who knew it worked?). Robyn Kramer
volunteered her ears, nose, and throat to be probed, picked , and palpated. Obviously, the written word is
incapable of conveying the wonders of Robyn's sinuses, so tomorrow stop her in the hall and look for yourself.
... Often times, the questions you ask will pinpoint the problem. For example, if a patient comes in with some
bilateral hearing loss, what are some possible questions for the patient?
1. Do you work construction, build ships for Avondale, etc.
2. Do you listen to Ted Nugent at high volume on your walkman all day?
3. Do you drive a 6.6L 1978 Trans-Am with oversized pistons, headers, and dual exhausts which can be
heard 10 miles away? (sigh)
... After examining for sun-induced cancer, check for any signs of external deformity. For example if a Big Ten
football player comes to you complaining of problems breathing through his nose, and his nose is under his left
eye, you can assume that the external trauma has caused intemal damage. (Talk slow to the guy; Big Ten athletes
are kind of slow.
)
... The intemal exam requires the use of the dreaded hair puller, the nasal speculum... The midline of the nose
contains bones and nerves, and attempts to distend it will bring a call from Morris Bart (one call of course)...
when removing the speculum, DO NOT CLOSE IT WHILE TT IS STILL INSERTED. This will rip out nose
hairs, and while watching y